What Lies Beneath
by Lunaschild2016
Summary: A nip here, a tuck there; trimming the fat in places and injecting it in others. This is my version of Divergent with small changes. Tris is stronger, more Dauntless. Eric is more cruel..or is he? Four loved Tris before she even knew. Gia is the a catalyst for changes in all. Told from the POV's of Tris, Four, Eric and Gia as they move through the first book. Four/Tris; Eric/OC M
1. Chapter 1

_What Lies Beneath [Breaking Benjamin]_

 _Here we go_

 _Does it hurt_

 _Say goodbye_

 _To this world_

 _I will not_

 _Be undone_

 _Come to life_

 _It gets worse_

 _All in all_

 _You're no good_

 _You don't cry_

 _Like you should_

 _I'll be gone_

 _When you fall_

 _Your sad life_

 _Says it all_

 _So I'll find what lies beneath_

 _Your sick twisted smile_

 _As I lay underneath_

 _Your cold jaded eyes_

 _Now you turn the tide on me_

 _'Cause you're so unkind_

 _I will…_

 _So I'll find what lies beneath_

 _Your sick twisted smile_

 _As I lay underneath_

 _Your cold jaded eyes_

 _Now you turn the tide on me_

 _'Cause you're so unkind_

 _I will always be here_

 _For the rest of my life_

 _Don't carry me under_

 _You're the Devil in disguise_

 _God sing for the hopeless_

 _I'm the one you left behind_

 _So I'll find what lies beneath_

 _Your sick twisted smile_

 _As I lay underneath_

 _Your cold jaded eyed_

 _Now you turn the tide on me_

 _'Cause you're so unkind_

 _I will always be here_

 _For the rest of my life_

 **Chapter 1**

Tris' POV

Today is the Choosing Ceremony. Since yesterday I have been a tangled mess of thoughts and emotions. I have three choices before me. In reality I don't and never really have had a choice. I think I have always known where I was going to go it is just so hard to think about losing everyone I love when I do.

Especially last night after dinner when the subject had turned to our Senior Leader Marcus Eaton. Two years ago his son defected to another faction. Almost all of our faction sees anyone leaving the faction as a betrayal. For a leader's child to do so is almost even more unforgivable.

Hearing my father's tone and how close to hateful it sounded when Tobias Eaton was mentioned, it had hurt to know that soon he would think of me that way too.

We take the bus to get to the Choosing Ceremony. It is full of people in gray shirts and gray slacks. I hate the slow meandering of the bus. I have always hated it and the rough roads that cause everyone to jostle and jerk against each other.

I hate when I have to give my seat up and stand, making the ride even worse for me. This is just one of the millions of reasons that I know I could never stay in Abnegation no matter how much I want to be with my family.

I follow my parents off the bus. Caleb seems calm, but so would I, if I knew what I was going to do and that it wouldn't be killing those I love. The elevator is crowded so my father volunteers to give a cluster of Amity our place. I follow as we climb the stairs but the entire time I am wondering why they couldn't take the stairs when they are so much more used to walking, climbing and labor in general, than we are.

I don't mind the climb. I don't mind the activity. What I mind is the fact that because others might be inconvenienced to have to wait, how dreadful for them, I have to be inconvenienced.

I must have given a huff or sigh out loud because Caleb shot me his disapproving look as we continued to climb the stairs. My father holds the door open on the twentieth floor and stands like a sentry as every Abnegation walks past him. Most are winded and panting even though they try to hide it. I try to act like I am winded and panting, another marker in my mind that I do not belong.

When I can, when I can not be caught and scolded, I run. I climb. I break free into sprints for as long and far as I can. As I do, I imagine myself running after the train just like the Dauntless. I imagine myself reaching out and grabbing onto the car door then letting it whip me along to a new home and new life.

She said that I should think on my choice, the Dauntless that told me what I am is dangerous. I have thought on it my entire life. Every time I was scolded for not being able to just be selfless without thought. Every time I watched the Dauntless jump on or off the train. Every time I saw them in the cafeteria at school, I have thought about it.

I know what my choice is. I just wonder how much I will feel like I have lost part of myself when I do it.

The room is arranged in concentric circles. On the edges stand the eighteen-year-olds of every faction. We are not called members yet; our decisions today will make us initiates, and we will become members if we complete initiation.

We arrange ourselves in alphabetical order; according to the last names we may leave behind today. I stand between Caleb and Danielle Pohler, an Amity girl with rosy cheeks and a yellow dress.

Rows of chairs for our families make up the next circle. They are arranged in five sections, according to faction. Not everyone in each faction comes to the Choosing Ceremony, but enough of them come that the crowd is huge.

I watch as the faction that will be conducting the ceremony this year moves to ready the bowls that represent each faction into place, readying the last minute details. This year is Abnegation and our Senior Leader Marcus Eaton will be give the opening speech then call each dependent to the center where we will choose our fate.

My eyes move over the bowls and take in the position of each in relation to the other. I can see now, when I break down my actions and thoughts, where my Erudite comes into play. I had never thought of it as Erudite. I really just thought I had more common sense then most.

Each bowl has a substance that represents it in the bowl. Gray stones for Abnegation, water for Erudite, earth for Amity, lit coals for Dauntless, and glass for Candor.

When Marcus calls my name, I will walk to the center of the three circles. I will not speak. He will offer me a knife. I will cut into my hand and sprinkle my blood into the bowl of the faction I choose.

Before my parents sit down, they stand in front of Caleb and me. My father kisses my forehead and claps Caleb on the shoulder, grinning.

"See you soon," he says. Without a trace of doubt.

My mother hugs me, and the pain I knew I would feel starts to bloom in my chest. I clench my jaw and stare up at the ceiling, where globe lanterns hang and fill the room with blue light. She holds me for what feels like a long time, even after I let my hands fall. Before she pulls away, she turns her head and whispers in my ear, "I love you. No matter what. Be brave Beatrice. You are my daughter after all."

My forehead furrows and I feel myself frown. She pulls away and I see her nod once, knowing I must be making assumptions. Can she feel my frown as she walks away? Did she really just tell me not only to choose Dauntless….but that she was from Dauntless? She must know or she wouldn't have felt the need to tell me that. Then again it wasn't hard for my family to know. I had never been good at playing the daughter of sacrifice.

Caleb grabs my hand, squeezing my palm so tightly it hurts, but I don't let go. The last time we held hands was at my uncle's funeral, as my father cried and the Erudite around us looked on in unemotional masks. Caleb and I need each other's strength right now, just as we did then.

The room slowly comes to order. I should be observing the Dauntless; I should be taking in as much information as I can. I can only stare at the lanterns across the room. I lose myself in the blue glow and listen to my breathing. I don't know how I do this but I have always been able to. I center myself and push all the nerves and doubts out of my mind. When I have done this, I feel my heart steady and my breathing even out.

Caleb looks at me and raises an eyebrow but he doesn't say anything. He never does when I do this but I can see this is something he envies about me. Internally I have always reveled when he has shown envy for something I do when there is so much I have always envied about him.

I tune out the speech that Marcus launches into. I squeeze Caleb's hand back when he squeezes mine. I let my eyes roam around the room and take things in. All the while looking at the people and wonder how many will go home without their children on this day? How many will go home and start to erase them from their minds and hearts?

I think of the motto I read in my Faction History textbook: _Faction before blood_. More than any family, our factions are where we belong. Can that possibly be right though? When a Dauntless boy lets his blood fall into the bowl of glass and not the coals my breath catches. The first transfer to another faction.

Dauntless will see him as a traitor from now on. His Dauntless family will have the option of visiting him in his new home in his new faction, a week and a half from now on Visiting Day, but they won't because he left them. His absence will haunt their hallways and will be a space they can't fill.

That is what kills me the most about my leaving. There will be that hole in my heart that once held my family and the one in theirs that once held me.

One by one, each dependent steps out of line and walks to the middle of the room. The room is constantly moving, a new name and a new person choosing, a new knife and a new choice. I recognize most of them, but I doubt they know me.

I see an Erudite girl that I am friendly with. A surprise to me when she helped me last year after a Candor boy had purposely tripped me in the hallway at school. I had fell hard enough that my wrist was sprained and I hadn't been able to contain the cry of surprise that escaped me.

The cry of surprise when a whirl of blue had set upon the boy and shoved him to the ground, face first but made him face me so his eyes were locked onto mine.

"Apologize now Candor or I will rip your damn arm out of it's socket." I had looked up to her, expecting to see a face full of fury considering the words. But her tone and face were devoid of emotion or rage. They were calm but they reminded me of the eye of a storm. A whirling amber and gold hurricane with flecks of green, where all around her was chaos but her center was nothing but calm.

The boy, one I recognized as a troublemaker at school, had apologized. But I had a feeling by his wincing it had taken some pressure from the girl. Before she let him up she had met my eyes and winked before she hauled him up then kicked his ass, literally, on his way.

He had thrown a scowl to her over his shoulder but it disappeared quickly when she gave him the most wicked smile I had ever seen. It transformed her heart shaped, angelic face into something feral and even more beautiful.

That was only topped when she had looked down at me and then turned a real, dimpled and friendly smile on me. She leaned down and held my eyes.

"Can I look at it?" Her voice was soft and not condescending at all as she asked for permission to look at my wrist. The one that I hadn't realized I was holding gingerly.

I looked around, the hallway had nearly emptied even though there were several minutes left before the next class. I gave her a small smile and nodded. I had never had the issues with touch as others of my faction did. Our parents had been affectionate with us and my brother and I had been as well when we were younger.

She took my wrist in her hands and moved it slightly. I noticed that her hands were rough and calloused. I remembered the way she had handled the Candor and I knew that she wouldn't be staying in Erudite.

"Giana Pearle," was called and my eyes followed her eagerly.

I had found out over the last year or two that she was top of her class in Erudite. She was also considered something of a social pariah because of her temper and the fact that she was so unpredictable. I had my theories about that and her. But I hadn't been able to spend more than a little time here or there when she always somehow showed up in my stolen moments of running.

There was whispering from the Erudite section as she walked. I couldn't tell if it was in expectation of her leaving or if it was apprehension.

I got my answer when she marched straight for the Dauntless bowl and never hesitated as she let her blood fall into the coals. There were several cries of disbelief and outrage coming from Erudite. My eyes found the strongest among them but I was transfixed by the cold and menacing glare I saw coming from Jeanine Matthews. I felt a shiver run down my spine at this rare and unheard of show of emotion from the Erudite leader. It was quickly gone as if it had never existed.

Apparently she hadn't expected Gia to defect and she was less than pleased about it.

I am soon pulled out of any more reflections because finally it is Caleb being called.

"Caleb Prior," says Marcus.

Caleb squeezes my hand one last time, and as he walks away, casts a look at me over his shoulder. I think I know in that instant that Caleb will not be going home with our parents tonight either.

I missed the signs because I could only think of myself, but I think I always knew this about him too. When he holds his hand over the Erudite bowl his blood drips into the water and it is fascinating to watch it turn a deeper shade of red.

I hear mutters that lift into outraged cries. All but for in the Erudite section, where they wear smug smiles and nudge each other. The Abnegation, normally so placid, speak to one another in tense whispers and glare across the room at the faction that has become our enemy.

"Excuse me," says Marcus, but the crowd doesn't hear him. He shouts, "Quiet, please!"

The room goes silent but my eyes narrow because for a moment I had seen something in his eyes. Something that made me feel like I was seeing behind a mask. The words of my father last night come to mind but I have no time to think over them. My name is being called.

This has shaken me up. The pain I know I will cause and then knowing that losing Caleb will make it double. My life, should I choose to stay in Abnegation, flashes before my eyes. I shudder in revulsion at it and I know I am not selfless enough to do it.

I set my jaw. I cannot be the child that stays for her parents. No matter how I wish I could, in the end I would only suffer and they would too. Because I would forever be a disappointment for them. I never fit in before and making that choice for them wouldn't make it any better.

Marcus offers me my knife. I look into his eyes, a dark blue color that look odd on him. I take the knife as he nods to me and I turn towards the bowls.

Dauntless fire and Abnegation stones are both on my left, one in front of my shoulder and one behind. I hold the knife in my right hand and touch the blade to my palm. Gritting my teeth in determination and against the pain I drag the blade down. It stings but I realize not nearly as bad as I thought it would. I hold both hands to my chest and let out a long slow breath.

I open my arms and thrust my arm out. My blood drips into the bowl of the lit coals, sizzling.

I am selfish and I am brave. I will be going home and to the only one I ever really contemplated.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: A little about the story before you. It will follow along with the book up until the end and then it will start to deviate. You will see why this is as the chapters progress. Gia will be giving pushes and making minute changes all along that will cause the outcome to be different than the books. The M rating is for violence and sexual content that will be later on and scattered through the book.**

 **Chapter 2**

I train my eyes on the floor and stand behind the Dauntless-born initiates who chose to return to their own faction. They are all taller than I am, so even when I lift my head, I see only black-clothed shoulders. When the last girl makes her choice - Amity - it's time to leave.

Dauntless exit first and I walk past the gray clothed men and women who were my faction, staring determinedly at the back of someone's head. In the end the need to see my parent's one more time wins out. I look over my shoulder at the last second before I pass them and immediately wish I hadn't. My father's eyes burn into mine with a look of accusation. At first, when I feel the heat behind my eyes, I think he's found a way to set me on fire to punish me for what I have done. Then I realize I am about to cry and my chin juts out.

Beside him my mother is smiling, she gives me a nod and I can see her chin raise briefly. She is telling me again to be brave. To stay strong and I feel my spine snap at that.

A ghost of a smile crosses my lips before I am being pressed forward and away from my family. I glance at the boy to my left, who was Erudite and now looks pale and nervous as we head to the stairs. The crowd of Dauntless lead us down, yelling and laughing.

I can feel that ghost of a smile widen as we thunder down the stairwells. It is a stark comparison to the stoic act of selflessness from earlier. This isn't selfless, this is freedom.

"What the hell is going on?" the boy next to me shouts.

I just shake my head with a laugh and keep running. I see the bouncing hair of Gia towards the front and can't help but laugh. She has already pulled her golden blonde hair from it's bun and it is bouncing along with her jumping and running down the stairs.

Outside, the air is crisp and cold. The sky is orange from the setting sun and it reflects off the glass of the Hub.

The Dauntless sprawl across the street, blocking the path of a bus, and I sprint to keep pace with them. I don't strain near as much as I would had I stopped running. I keep pace well and I see Dauntless throwing me strange looks. I follow them down the street and around the corner. I hear a familiar sound that has me smiling. The train horn.

"Oh no," mumbles the Erudite boy. "Are were supposed to hop on that thing?"

"Yes," I say as my chest heaves with the rush of adrenaline.

I hear the familiar voice of Gia laughing as she moves towards me but is holding eyes with the Erudite. "What's the matter Will? Already ready to call it quits? Come on where is all that moxy you were showing last night? Or does it take getting a few drinks into you for that to come out?"

Will blushes slightly, or maybe it is just color returning to his almost devoid of blood skin, and his chin lifts. "I'm not giving up."

"Thatta boy." Gia laughs out then winks over at me.

"Get ready Abby." She uses the faction nickname she had uses for me when we address each other in public. She had refused to call me Bea or Beatrice. Said neither fit me and until I found one that did, she wasn't going to call me anything but Abby. She had no patience for most of the faction slurs and made up her own names for them.

I give her a nod as my face splits into a smile. I may have never actually caught the train before but in my mind I have a million times. I have also spent so much time watching the Dauntless arrive at school that I know the process inside and out.

The crowd spreads out in a long line. The train glides toward us on steel rails, its light flashing, its horn blaring. The door of each car is open, waiting for the Dauntless to pile in, and they do, group by group, until only the new initiates are left. The Dauntless-born initiates are used to doing this by now, so in a second it's just faction transfers left.

Gia had already boarded the car and I could tell she had been torn on waiting for me. I keep up with the car just fine. I have the problem when I go to pull myself into the car. I cling to the handle next to the doorway, my shoulder slamming into the car. My arms shake and finally Gia reaches out and grabs me to pull me in. At the same time a Candor girl had reached out but then pulls back when she sees Gia has me.

Gasping, I thank Gia and turn to smile at the Candor as well to thank her. We hear a shout and look over our shoulders. A short Erudite boy with red hair pumps his arms as he tries to catch up to the train. Another Erudite girl by the door reaches out to grab the boy's hand, straining, but he is too far behind. He falls to his knees next to the tracks as we sail away, and puts his head in his hands.

I feel uneasy but I don't feel bad. I should, but I don't. I should because he just failed Dauntless initiation. He is factionless now. It could happen to any of us at any moment.

"You ok?" the Candor girl who was standing with us asks briskly. She is tall with dark brown skin and short hair. She is pretty and reminds me of a willow in frame. They would call her willowy. I smirk to myself in my head.

I nod, though, to her question.

"I'm Christina," she says, offering her hand to both Gia and I.

Gia eyes her and I can tell she is wanting to glare at her for not asking me first. She takes her hand and I can tell by the wince Chris has that she must have gripped her hand a little too firmly. I bite my lip to stop from laughing.

"Gia." She says briskly as she pumps Christina's hand a few times then let go and looks to me to see if I am ok with the contact.

I shrug and offer her my hand as well. "Beatrice." I say in reply and hear Gia snort at me still using the name.

Christina apparently doesn't hear this or doesn't care. "Do you know where we're going?" She shouts over the wind, which blows harder through the open doors by the second. The train is picking up speed and it will make it harder to keep balance between the motion and the wind. The lower we get the better we will be.

Gia and I exchange looks as we sit down and Christina raises an eyebrow at us.

"A fast train means wind." I say but then Gia picks up the rest with a smirk and a nod.

"Wind means falling. So unless you just want to land on your ass hard...get down." I am used to her snarky tone by now. I actually enjoy it. She can be just as sarcastic as I could.

Christina chooses to sit next to me and I can tell she isn't caring for Gia. She can be an acquired taste. Those were the words she used when I asked her why she didn't have many friends among the Erudite.

"I would assume we are going to Dauntless headquarters." I say finally in answer to her question. "I don't know where it is though."

Christina shakes her head grinning. "Does anyone? It's like they just popped out of a hole in the ground or something."

Gia laughs and I can see her dimples showing. "Oh, if you only knew." I hear her mutter just low enough that I can only hear since Christina is on the other side of me.

I don't get a chance to ask her what she means because the wind rushes through the car and the other faction transfers, hit with bursts of air, fall on top of one another.

Christina's eyes go wide as she looks at the two of us but we start laughing. She joins us but it is caught on the wind and we can only tell we are laughing by our expressions of mirth.

A brief thought flashes through my head at that moment. A flash of guilt that I am not more sad when I see the faint outlines of the rows of gray houses that used to be my home. It is brief as Gia and I stretch our legs out and share smiles.

I notice the fake glasses she was wearing earlier are gone too. I could imagine those were the first to go. I take a moment to take in her outfit and mine.

I wear the customary grey slacks, grey shirt and confining grey jacket of my faction. I was glad I had went with the slacks we are allowed to wear as long as we wear the long jacket. It had allowed me to run more freely.

Gia had gone with slacks as well but it was all in the deepest blue she could find. Her button up silk blouse was now undone, showing a deep blue tank top all tucked into a midnight blue legging type of pant. On her feet were the most telling item of where she had been headed to; black combat boots.

She smirks at where my eyes had gone and shrugged.

"They're jumping off!"

I lift my head from where it had gone to rest on Gia's shoulder. My neck aches. I have been curled up with my back against the wall for at least a half hour, listening to the roaring wind and watching the city smear past us. I sit forward. The train has slowed down in the past few minutes and I see the boy who shouted is right. The Dauntless in the cars ahead of us are jumping out as the train passes a rooftop. The tracks are seven stories up.

The idea of leaping out of a moving train onto a rooftop, knowing there is a gap between the edge of the roof and the edge of the track, makes me want to throw up. I have no time to dwell on it because Gia gives me a hard look and pulls me up with her.

It has always surprised me how strong she is under the clothes that she uses to mask that. I have seen how fit she truly is a few times but to look at her now you wouldn't know.

She stands at about 5'8 and is taller than me but that isn't hard to be. The way she wore her clothes accented her curves that are really made by her toned limbs. I felt inadequate beside her but I resolved that would not always be the case.

We move to stand where the other faction transfers are at in a line.

"We have to jump off too, then," a Candor girl says. She has a large nose and crooked teeth.

"Great," a Candor boy replies. I recognize him as the same one that had tripped me last year and inwardly groan. "Because that makes perfect sense, Molly. Leap off a train onto a roof."

I feel Gia tense and hear her mumble something about 'could only hope you don't make it' before the Candor girl replies to the boy.

"This is kind of what we signed up for, Peter." the girl points out.

"Well, I'm not doing it." An Amity boy behind me says. He has olive skin and wears a brown shirt. He is the only transfer from Amity. His cheeks shine with tears.

"You've got to," Christina says, "or you fail. Come on, it'll be alright."

"No! I won't do it! I'd rather be factionless than be dead." The Amity boy shakes his head as his panic sets in.

Gia's eyes go hard and her tone goes deadly. "Then you are as good as dead. Because all you will _want_ it is to be dead when you join your new family."

She is right. I would rather be dead than be empty husks like the factionless.

We both see Christina flinch at the harsh tone and words and I shake my head. "You can't force him." I say to her. Her brown eyes are wide and she presses her lips together so hard they change color.

She offers me her hand.

"Here," she says. I raise an eyebrow at her hand, about to say that I don't need help as my chin juts out. Then she sighs and adds, "I just…..can't do it unless someone drags me."

I hear Gia scoff, then see her move to the edge of the car before us as I take Christina's hand. She is already standing at the edge of the car and has jumped. As we get in place I count. "One...two...three!"

On three we launch off the train car. A weightless moment, and then my feet slam into solid ground and pain prickles through my shins. The jarring landing sends me sprawling on the rooftop, gravel under my cheek. I release Christina's hand and hear her laughing.

"That was fun," She says.

I know in that moment that she will fit in with the Dauntless thrill seekers but the rest will remain to be seen for all of us. All the initiates except the Amity boy made it onto the roof, with varying levels of success.

Gia was smiling and winked at me appearing casual and as if that had been a stroll in the park for her. It wouldn't surprise me if it weren't to be honest. She was kind of crazy.

The Candor girl with crooked teeth, Molly, holds her ankle, wincing, and Peter, the Candor boy with shiny hair grins proudly. He must have landed on his feet.

There is a wail that sounds. I turn my head, searching for the source of the sound. A Dauntless girl stands at the edge of the roof, staring at the ground below, screaming. Behind her a Dauntless boy holds her at the waist to keep her from falling off.

"Rita," he says. "Rita, calm down. Rita-"

I see Gia shake her head slightly at me just before I move to go to look over the ledge. She has her hard face again and I see she is telling me to walk away. It will do me no good to see the broken body at the bottom of the building.

What I do is to memorize this moment though. This could happen to any of us at anytime. Not even the Dauntless born are safe. It isn't all fun and games, this is our lives. This is how things work here. We do dangerous things and people die.

People die and we move on to the next dangerous thing. This is why we need to be brave and face our fears. Because in the end one day we will be facing our own death. It is how we choose to meet that death that makes us Dauntless.

My lips pursed, I walk away from Rita and the roof's edge.

My elbow stings. I pull my sleeve up to examine it, my hand shaking. Some of the skin is peeling off but it isn't bleeding.

"Ooh. Scandalous! A Stiff's flashing some skin!"

I lift my head and see Peter pointing to me, smirking. As I hear laughter I see Gia tense and turn slowly back towards Peter. I catch her eyes and shake my head slightly.

She can't always stick up for me. I can't be weak or show weakness or he will try and prey on me. Her jaw clenches and I can tell she is already plotting something for him for later. She luckily lets it go though. We both turn our attention to the ledge when a booming voice shouts at us.

"Listen up! My name is Max! I am one of the leaders of your new faction!" He is older than the other Dauntless as he stands on the other side of the roof. He has dark hair that is greying at his temples. He is standing on the ledge as if it is just a sidewalk and like someone didn't just fall to their death from it.

"Several stories below us is the member's entrance to our compound. If you can't muster the will to jump off, you don't belong here. Our initiates have the privilege of going first."

"You want us to jump off a _ledge_?" asks an Erudite girl. She is a few inches taller than I am with mousy brown hair and big lips. Her mouth hangs open.

I don't know why it shocks her and I can tell by Gia's small exasperated sigh she doesn't either.

"Yes," Max says looking amused.

"Is there water at the bottom or something?"

"Who knows?" He raises his eyebrows.

The crowd in front of the initiates splits in half, making a wide path for us. I look around. I can see Gia sending me motions with her eyes. I can tell by her rocking on her feet she is wanting to go but she is trying to tell me something.

I have more to prove. They will think I am weak because I am "The Stiff". I need to go first. I am proud. It will get me into trouble someday but today it makes me brave and want to prove them all wrong. I walk toward the ledge and hear snickers behind me.

Max steps aside leaving my way clear. I walk to the ledge and look down. I do what I have always been able to do. Focus on something and regulate my breathing until that and my heart rate even out.

I determine quickly that this is a scare tactic. Dauntless are brave but not suicidal. I will land safely at the bottom even if I don't know what I will be landing on or in.

My hand fumbles along the collar of my jacket from the cold that grips me with the bite of the wind. I find the buttons that secure it shut and after a few tries I undo the hooks from the collar to hem and pull it off my shoulders.

Beneath it I wear a gray T-shirt. It is tighter than my other clothes I own and no one has ever seen me in it before. I ball up my jacket and look over my shoulder at Peter. I throw the ball of fabric at him as hard as I can, my jaw clenched. It hits him in the chest and I can see a look of complete surprise come over his face as he stares at me with his eyes wide in disbelief.

I look at the hole again. Goose bumps rise on my pale arms and my stomach lurches but in a good way. I want this. I don't think. I just bend my knees and jump.

Before I do though I hear the distinctive voice of Gia calling out. "That is about as close as you will ever get a girl to take her clothes off for you Candor Peter."

I smile as gravity takes me and my laughter joins that of the others on the roof.

The air howls in my ears as the ground surges toward me, growing and expanding. Or am I surging toward the ground? My body starts to tense but I realize there is this freeing sense of weightlessness surrounding me. The hole surrounds me and I drop into darkness.

I hit something hard but my body moves with it fluidly in my now relaxed state. Whatever I hit gives way beneath me and cradles my body. The impact still knocks the wind out of me. I laugh and wheeze at the same time. My arms and legs sting slightly.

It was a net. At the bottom of the deep dark hole….is a net. I look up at the building and my now restored breath lets my laugh ring out. My body shakes with it as I cover my face with my hands. I just jumped off a roof and want to know when I can do it again!

I know I need to move because Gia will be chomping at the bit to get her turn. I see a few hands stretching out to me at the edge of the net, so I grab the first one I can reach and pull myself across. I roll off and I would have fallen face-first onto a wood floor if he had not caught me.

"He" is the young man attached to the hand I grabbed. He has a spare upper lip and a full lower lip. His eyes are so deep-set that his eyelashes touch the skin under his eyebrows and they are a dark blue. A beautiful, dreaming, sleeping, waiting color that I already think might be my new favorite color.

His hands grip my arms but he releases me a moment after I stand upright again. I can't help the frown that crosses my face at the loss of contact.

"Thank you," I manage to say.

We stand on a platform ten feet above the ground. Around us is an open cavern.

"Can't believe it," a voice says from behind him. It belongs to a dark haired girl with three silver rings through her right eyebrow. She smirks at me. "A Stiff, the first to jump? Unheard of."

I can feel my back snap straight and my chin lift even as 'he' scowls at the girl. "There's a reason why she left Lauren," he says in a stern voice. His voice is deep and it rumbles. "What's your name?"

"Umm…" I hesitate remembering Gia's insistence that Bea and Beatrice don't fit me. She is right...they won't fit me. They never really did.

"Think about it," he says with a faint smile curling his lips. "You don't get to pick again."

A new place a new name. I can be remade here.

"Tris." I say firmly.

"Tris," Lauren repeats with a grin. "Make the announcement, Four."

The boy, Four, looks over his shoulder and shouts. "First jumper, Tris!"

A crowd materializes from the darkness as my eyes adjust. They cheer and pump their fists and then another person drops into the net.

Her laughter rings the entire way down and fills the cavern. She laughs harder when she hits the net.

Her laughter is infectious and everyone begins to laugh with her as well as cheering.

Four sets his hand on my back and says, "Welcome to Dauntless."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I hope everyone is enjoying the story so far. Would appreciate any feedback on if you like the direction I am going with this. Just want to shout out to two of my biggest supporters who really do put up with my whirling vortex of a mind. sleepy1177 and Damn You Kylie. DYK I took your suggestion, tossed a coin and lost it...so neither of those stories are what I ended up posting! Haha.**

 **Disclaimer: This is V Roth's tilt-a-whirl. I am just plopping my own oc's down and changing up the tune with a little Ozzy. Ready to go off the rails anyone?**

 **Chapter 3**

 _Gia's POV_

I almost lost my breath when I saw him on the ledge. To be this close, finally, but not be able to do a damn thing about it was killing me. I kept my face free of emotion though as I listened to him calling for jumpers.

I knew I wanted to go first but Tris needed go first more. It would put her on the board with points and she needed those more than anything. I caught her eye and motioned her with them.

She was much brighter than she ever gave herself credit for. I am sure after her aptitude test she was clued in a little more, but that was her secret to tell and I would only approach her if she waited too long to share it.

I could see her back stiffen as she nodded to me and moved forward. I was steps behind her because there was no way I wasn't going next. The girl Christina shot me a glare, or what she thought was a glare. I returned it and smirked when she flinched back a little but then nodded to me.

Pecking order bitch. Learn it.

Make nice Gia, I scolded myself. I was already scoffing at that thought. I could make nice when I wasn't dealing with stupid. I had a feeling I was going to be put into a whole world of stupid with some of these transfers.

I watch as Max moves to clear the way for Tris and as she takes her jacket off, balls it up and throws it at Peter. I smirked widely at that and as she prepares to jump I can't resist pulling his attention from her to me.

"That is about as close as you will ever get a girl to take her clothes off for you, Candor Peter." I taunt him. There is laughter all around including Tris.

Peter shoots me a glare but as soon as I turn my eyes on him, the ones he got to know so very well over the last two years, he cowers back. This brings more laughter when he literally raises his hands above his head as if I was going to launch into an attack right there.

Come on Peter. I am smarter than that. I roll my eyes and move forward. Max smirks at me but his head is tilted. For a moment, a brief moment, his forehead narrows as he looks into my eyes. Whatever he thought he saw he must dismiss it. He shakes his head as if to clear it and motions me to jump.

I let out a breath of disappointment and then wipe it away. I step forward calmly. I step right off the ledge and laugh as I fall. I am still laughing when I hit the net. It didn't lessen the enjoyment that I knew what was waiting.

I give my name to the guy that helped me from the net. The girl, Lauren, had called him Zeke. She had informed another Dauntless named Four to call my name and then Zeke clapped my back with a blinding smile and pointed for me to go stand by Beatrice.

She had finally chosen a name. Tris. Much better and I smiled with my dimples showing as I bounced over to her.

"You finally did it, Abby. Much better name. It only took you two years to come up with it." I smirk at her as I have to look down only slightly.

She blushes a little but shrugs. "Maybe I just wanted to get it right. We weren't all blessed with such badass names as you already had."

I laugh at that. "You heard the full name right? Giana? No thank you. I cannot tell you how many people I had to give bloody noses for deciding Ana was the more acceptable nickname for it."

I see her shudder and I laugh. "Exactly."

When all the initiates stand on solid ground again, Lauren and Four lead us down a narrow tunnel. The walls are made of stone, and the ceiling slopes so it feels like you are descending deep into the heart of the earth. In essence, we are.

I see Tris look at me with a furrowed forehead and she leans closer to me. "You knew?"

I shrug and smile. "I did, but it is better to see it for ourselves. I haven't seen it in person before. I just got the plans and blueprints while I was still in Erudite." I whisper this lowly to her and I hear her give a small gasp but then smile.

"That will come in handy." She says smugly.

I nod in the same manner as we continue along. The tunnel is lit at long intervals so in the dark space between each lamp it is hard to make out anything really. I have better low light vision than most so I don't need to be guided by touch.

The Erudite boy in front of us stops abruptly and before I can pull her back Tris smacks into him. She hits her nose on his shoulder. She starts to stumble back as she rubs her nose but I catch and brace her.

The whole crowd has stopped and our three leaders stand in front of us, arms folded.

"This is where we divide," Lauren says. "The Dauntless-born initiates are with me. I assume _you_ don't need a tour of the place."

She smiles and beckons toward the Dauntless-born initiates. They break away from the group and dissolve into the shadows. I watch the last heel pass out of the light and look at those of us who are left. Most of the initiates were from Dauntless so only ten people remain. Of those, Tris is the only Abnegation transfer. The only Amity transfer chose to go factionless. The rest are from Erudite and, joy of joy's, Candor.

I haven't been impressed with any of the Candor transfers so far and foresee some fun times ahead trying to keep myself from arranging training accidents.

Four addresses us next. "Most of the time I work in the control room but for the next few weeks I am your instructor," he says. "My name is Four."

Christina gives a little giggle and asks, "Four? Like the number?"

"Yes," Four says. "Is there a problem?"

"No."

"Good. We're about to go into the Pit, which you will someday learn to love. It -"

Christina snickers loudly and I feel my jaw clench. Is it possible to hate someone so instantly? Well for me, yeah I guess it is. I hate most everyone.

Four walks up to Christina and leans his face close to hers. His eyes narrow and for a second he just stares at her.

"What's your name?" He asks quietly.

"Christina." She squeaks out.

"Well, Christina, if I wanted to put up with Candor smart-mouths I would have joined their faction," he hisses to her. "The first lesson you will learn from me is to keep your mouth shut. Got it?"

She nods and gulps.

I shake my head a little at her stupidity but I already know this won't have cured that mouth of hers. Or any of the Candor's really.

Four starts toward the shadow at the end of the tunnel. The crowd of initiates moves on in silence.

"What a jerk," she mumbles.

"I guess he doesn't like to be laughed at," Tris replies, her jaw clenched.

"Or maybe it just isn't a good idea to talk shit or talk back to your superiors. Not unless you are prepared to face the consequences." I say quietly with a shrug.

"Consequences?" Christina yelps with wide eyes and looks over to me.

I sigh and shake my head. "Did you do any studying in Faction History? No don't answer that, the answer is plain as fucking day. You disobey a superior, commit insubordination, commit a crime or are negligent of duty at all and there are consequences. Even as initiates. Especially as initiates as a matter of fact. It could be anywhere from running extra laps to being put to death."

I see Tris nod slightly, her lips thinned, and hear Peter scoff behind me. "That is a pretty wide range of punishments. How do we know what gets what?"

Four's voice sounds from beside us. "You don't. That would depend, I guess on the leader and their mood. Best advice I could give is don't do something to piss one of us off and then you don't need to worry about it."

The group had all stopped just before a set of double doors and had moved to stand near us and listen.

He casts an appraising look at both Tris and I. His appraising look lingers slightly longer on Tris though. I suppress my smirk at that.

Without another word he walks back to the doors and pushes them open, allowing us to walk into the place he called "The Pit"

"Oh," whispers Christina. "I get it."

There is tittering around while Tris and I look at each other, biting our lips and rolling our eyes.

"Pit" is the best word for it. It is an underground cavern so huge I can't see the other end of it from where I stand at the bottom. Uneven rock walls rise several stories above my head. Built into the stone walls are places for food, clothing, supplies, leisure activities. Narrow paths and steps are carved from rock and connect them. There are no barriers to keep people from falling over the side.

A slant of orange light stretches across one of the rock walls. Forming the roof of the Pit are panes of glass and above them, a building that lets in sunlight. It would have looked like just another city building when we passed it on the train.

Blue lanterns dangle at random intervals above stone paths, similar to the ones that lit the Choosing room. They grow brighter as the sunlight dies.

People are everywhere, all dressed in black, all shouting and talking, expressive and gesturing. My eyes close and I breath in deeply. This is such a change from the cold and proper environment I was forced to grow up in.

A group of children run down a narrow path, laughing and playing. I can't help the smile at their antics.

"If you'll follow me," says Four, "I'll show you the chasm."

He waves us forward and my body tenses already. I have wanted to see and wondered about the Chasm. I have also dreaded seeing it in person finally. I can't help but catch Tris watching Four intently and my gaze goes to him as well.

He is attractive enough, though not my type. He is tall, long and lean. His appearance seems tame from the front, by Dauntless standards, but when he turns around, I see a tattoo peeking out from the collar of his T-shirt.

He leads us to the right side of the Pit, which is conspicuously dark. I don't need to squint but I see others doing so. The floor that we now stand on ends at an iron barrier. As we approach the railing, I hear a roar. Water, and fast moving water, crashing against rocks.

I look over the side. The floor drops off at a sharp angle and several stories below us is a river. Gushing water strikes the wall beneath me and sprays upward. To my left the water is calmer but to my right it is white, battling with rock.

"The chasm reminds us that there is a fine line between bravery and idiocy!" Four shouts. "A daredevil jump of this ledge will end your life. It has happened before and it will happen again. "You've been warned."

"This is incredible." Christina says as we all move away from the railing.

Tris nods as if in thought. "Incredible is the word."

Awe inspiring, frightening. Sad. So very fucking sad that all that wisdom ends because they are being forced too. He isn't that far from it and if I have anything to say about it that will be a cold day in hell when I let it happen to him.

Four leads the group of initiates across the Pit toward a gaping hole in the wall. The room beyond is well lit enough that I can see where we're going. A dining hall full of people and clattering silverware. When we walk in the Dauntless inside stand. They applaud. They stamp their feet. They shout. The noise surrounds me and fills me. I see Tris beaming as she reaches out and grabs my hand.

I am home finally. I will do everything I can to protect it, no matter what.

 _Four's POV_

She doesn't recognize me and that is ok. It wasn't like I had ever gotten the nerve up to go talk to her. I had been content to watch her from afar. Making sure she was ok as I hid in my secret places and she ran with wild abandon. I knew by watching her at school or out among our community that she wouldn't be staying. Not unless she learned to push all of the wild beauty and heart aside.

She surprised me that she was already overcoming so many of the hurdles I was still struggling with. She hadn't even been here for a day and she was already doing more than I did.

Her relationship with the Erudite girl was another surprise but so was the Erudite girl. She had the same demeanor as the one I had the worst time with during my initiation. She was also more insightful, less condescending and oddly protective of Tris. If I had to choose between the Candor and the Erudite who would be better for her, I would surprisingly go with the Erudite.

As the group stops to look for empty seats I see them look in the direction of the table I had chosen. I knew it would happen because there aren't many empty tables open. I also knew I wanted it to happen and that made me feel uncomfortable. Especially when Tris ends up beside me with Christina on her other side.

Gia takes the spot directly opposite me. Everyone but Tris begins to pull food from the center of the table that has platters of foods.

Tris makes a face and squeezes one of the pieces of meat in the burger buns.

I nudge her with my elbow.

"It's beef." I point to the meat in between the bread. "Put this on it." I pass her the small bowl full of ketchup.

"You've never had a hamburger before?" asks Christina, her eyes wide.

Gia stops making her burger up and turns her head slowly towards the Candor girl. A snarl forming on her lips before Tris clears her throat in what had to have been a laugh but masked it with a cough. She shook her head and patted her chest a little.

"Excuse me, must have had something stuck in my throat." She says with a smile and shrug as Gia rolls her eyes and laughs. She doesn't move her eyes from Christina though.

"Remember what I said about Faction History? Anyways, it doesn't matter anymore. What I ate before, what you ate before, what Tris ate before….all in the past. Something we should leave there, yeah?" She gave Christina a pointed look and though it was phrased as a question I could tell it really wasn't.

I had a feeling she was going to be trouble in training. I just didn't know how much trouble and if it was going to be trouble for me...or the other initiates. Something told me both.

With a nod everyone resumes making their plates and they have small talk. Tris makes a sarcastic comment that she left her old faction because of the food and I can't help but let my lips twitch at that.

The doors to the cafeteria open and the hush that always follows when he enters the room happens. I know who it is so I don't need to look. What has my attention is the way Gia's back snapped and her chin raised when she caught sight of him. More than that her eyes, a amber gold color, went colder than even he is capable of. Outside the iris is like a smoldering fire. In center is like deadly ice.

Tris had turned her head to look at him, as had Christina. I know what they are seeing. A young man, no older than me but built like a brick house. Every bit of him is lethal looking. His face is pierced in so many places you couldn't count them yet he always looks to be gaining more. His dark blonde hair is long. He had taken to putting styling gels in it for some reason and it makes it look greasy. The part that always inspires fear in people are his eyes. They make him look menacing. His eyes are cold, much like Gia's are. I feel his gaze skim over my back and mentally curse knowing what that means.

"Who's that?" hisses Christina.

"His name is Eric." I say but my eyes land on Gia whose fists clench on the table beside her plate. "He's a Dauntless leader."

"Seriously? But he's so young."

Gia's jaw clenches. "For fucks sake! Do I just need to go fucking buy a faction history book just to stop your inane fucking comments and questions? If you knew shit about your new faction you would know we prize skill, ability and physical prowess. Not to mention that being a Dauntless leader or senior member is hard. If you knew the fucking average life span of a Dauntless maybe you wouldn't be looking at age so much."

She says this with venom and my head tilts in thought. I can't even respond because Eric is suddenly plopped down beside me, smirking but his eyes are locked onto Gia.

"No, don't let me stop that interesting lecture. Do tell. What is the average lifespan of a Dauntless?" Eric asks in a smug but still deadly voice.

Gia's fists clench tightly and her eyes narrow. "Permission to speak freely, Sir?" She asks with her jaw still clenched but her tone is surprisingly respectful considering she has some kind of issue already with the young leader.

Eric's neck cracks to the side and his fists clench as well. "Sure, why the hell not. Permission granted."

A ghost of a smile graces her lips but her eyes never change from the deadly stare. They haven't broken eye contact once and I worry that I am going to have to find a way to keep Eric from her and possibly tossing her into the chasm.

"The average lifespan of a Dauntless in perfect health, by other faction standards, is too fucking short by half. But I don't make the rules, I just have to abide by them. It is a damn shame though that all that wisdom, all that strength of character, is wasted to the fucking waters of the chasm." Gia shrugs and I feel my heart pick up at the intensity of her speech and words.

She had seemed off when we were stopped there but why would it matter to her how the Dauntless elders were forced to do once they were deemed too feeble to survive the compounds environment?

I can see Eric is intrigued even if a little pissed at her words, he did give her permission to speak freely though.

"Interesting perspective. We do give them the option of going to the factionless though." Eric offers as if this is a calm debate and they weren't staring at each other with deadly eyes and clenched fists.

Gia's lips curl and even I had a pang of disgust but also uneasiness at the mention of the factionless. "Yes. Such a brilliant move and option. Either way, that is another topic for another time. You asked a question and as my leader I must give you a direct answer. The life expectancy of a Dauntless barring being KIA, MIA or sickness, is the ripe old age of 56 years young. A Dauntless soldier has the life expectancy of 22 years of age, on average. How many at this table are either at or close to that age do you think? Judging by the faces and doing a head count…" she pauses as if doing mental calculations that I somehow know she already knew. "That puts it at three of the seven people at this table alone would be one among that average."

There is silence, deadly silence, for uncomfortable minutes as Eric stares her down. There is some kind of silent communication going on between the two. Eric had begun to tap his fingers on the table, as if in thought or impatience.

I couldn't help but notice that Gia had started to tap the table as well and my eyebrow quirked. I cleared my throat, willing the moment to be over and did something I never did. I voluntarily spoke first to Eric.

"Was there something I could help you with Eric?" I had turned my head to look at him and said this in my most even, non confrontational tone I could muster when addressing this particular person.

Eric blinks as if he was brought out of some trance and turns his head to me. "Maybe. Aren't you going to introduce me?" He asks nodding to the three girls.

"This is Tris, Christina and Gia." I reply as I motion to each of them.

Eric gets a wicked smile on his face and I know what is coming as his eyes take in the color of her clothes. "Ooh, a Stiff," He replies with a smirk at Tris. "Well, we'll see how long you last."

His smile pulls at the piercings in his lips, making the holes they occupy wider. I feel Tris wince while I hear Gia snort in disgust and I internally sigh. Please lord let me just keep her alive until after dinner. Then she can be someone else's damn problem.

Surprisingly he doesn't say anything as he turns his eyes back on her. She looks him over, from his hair to his piercings, slowly. I could swear I see disgust and disappointment flash in her eyes before she masks them and picks up her burger to start eating. Careful not to look back at the leader.

What surprised me, and worries me more, is the look of hurt and pure rage in Eric's eyes before he masks it.

His tapping of his fingers on the table resumes before he turns to look at me. "What have you been doing lately, Four?"

I see Tris looking between me and Eric with a frown on her face. I shrug and raise my cup. "Nothing really."

"Max tells me he keeps trying to meet with you and you don't show up." Eric says with his jaw clenched again. "He requested that I find out what's going on with you."

I look at Eric for a few seconds, wondering what I should say that won't start his old rivalry again. I realize _anything_ I say will because it has never gone away for either of us. "Tell him that I am satisfied with the position I currently hold."

"So he wants to give you a job?"

"So it would seem." I reply evenly.

"And you aren't interested?" Eric's tone suggests that he still doesn't believe I am not gunning for his job.

"I haven't been interested for two years."

"Well," Eric says with a wicked smile forming again. "Let's hope he gets the point then."

He claps me on the shoulder a little too hard and on purpose. He starts to get up and pauses slightly as his eyes move over to Gia again.

Gia who is eating calmly and not once looking back in his direction. Eric growls as he gets up and stalks off. I am left in even more worry at his reaction. I will need to warn her about him and soon. Something tells me that she knows about him though. That they might have known each other in Erudite. If that is the case…..could she help me?

When Eric had moved away, I felt Tris slouch in relief at his exit. "Are you two….friends?" She says quietly but already in a disbelieving voice.

"We were in the same initiate class." I reply quickly. "He transferred from Erudite."

Tris perks up as she looks over, moving from my hair down my frame and makes me uncomfortable. Not only because I can see something sparking, recognition, in her eyes but also because it is very much in an appraising way.

"Were you a transfer too?"

"I thought I would only have trouble with the Candor asking too many questions." I say more coldly than I mean too. "Now I've got Stiffs too?"

Internally I am cursing myself for using that fucking word but I have to throw her off the trail somehow.

Anger and defiance flash in her eyes and I don't blame her. "It must be because you're so approachable." She says flatly. "You know, like a bed of nails."

Gia snorts and chokes on her food as she covers her mouth with her hand but I am still holding Tris eyes.

She gets a flush on her skin and cheeks but she still holds my eyes. As if she is trying to show she won't be submissive. Refuses to submit and I can feel desire flood me at that.

"Careful Tris." I get out in a soft and husky voice.

Careful that you don't bring more attention from others and damn if you don't need to be careful around me too. Who am I kidding though. She always had my attention and there was no way she wasn't getting it when she did join me here too.

Zeke calls my name so I glance at her one more time and move over to that table leaving two very troublesome fucking girls behind and hoping they didn't manage to piss anyone else off before tomorrow.

I sigh when I see Eric approach the table not even five minutes after I had sat down by Zeke.

"I need you two to go to control. There is an issue with the camera positioning in a few of the sectors and I need you to help the techs resolve it." Eric commands his normal manner but he also isn't looking at either of us. It doesn't take a genius to figure out where his gaze at though.

"I have to take the initiates to their dorms, give them the rundown of what is expected and the rules." I tell him with my eyebrow raised.

He finally looks back to me, glaring then shrugs. "I can show the pests the way to their dorm and tell them how things work. You two need to get that resolved before the next patrol sweep in two hours."

With that he doesn't even wait for my reply. He turns and heads back to the leader table. Zeke and I share a look. Eric doesn't volunteer for shit, especially not with training.

I know it has something to do with Gia, what I have no clue but it can't be good considering it is Eric.

 _Tris' POV_

I can't believe I just insulted our instructor. In my defense he did use that damn slur. The moment he did that there was no other option for me but to bite back. I can't show weakness or they will eat me alive.

"Careful, Tris." He replies quietly and I swear his voice sounds...warm and husky. His eyes are also darkened. I feel like I swallowed a swarm of butterflies.

A Dauntless member at another table calls out Four's name and I turn to Gia who is eating smugly but also looks to have just stopped laughing. Christina sighs and I turn to her.

"What?" I ask.

"I'm developing a theory."

"And it is?" I asked a little annoyed.

She picks up her hamburger, grins and says "That you two have a death wish."

Gia and I share looks and roll our eyes. Considering she was the one that kept opening her mouth when she shouldn't have, she is one to talk.

After dinner, Four disappears without a word. Eric leads us down a series of hallways without telling us where we're going. I don't know why a Dauntless leader would be responsible for a group of initiates, but maybe it is just for tonight.

At the end of each hallway is a blue lamp, but between them it's dark and I have to be careful not to stumble over uneven ground. Gia walks beside me and is even more tense than normal. She is glaring daggers at Eric's back and I can see him glancing back at her every once in awhile.

No one told us to be quiet but none of us speak except for the one time I asked Gia quietly where we were going. She had whispered dorms before we resumed the silence.

Eric stops in front of a wooden door and folds his arms. We gather around him and I can see his eyes automatically go to Gia again. What is their deal? I don't like the way he looks at her at all.

"For those of you who don't know, my name is Eric," he says. "I am one of five leaders of the Dauntless. We take the initiation process very seriously, so I volunteered to oversee most of your training."

The thought makes me nauseous but it raises my hackles the way he smirks as he says this looking at Gia. She gives a little growl before she stops, but her fists clench beside her. She isn't happy about it either.

The idea that a Dauntless leader will oversee our initiation is bad enough, but the fact that it's Eric makes it seem even worse.

"Some ground rules," he says. "You have to be in the training room by eight o'clock every day. Training takes place every day from eight to six, with a break for lunch. You are free to do whatever you like after six. You will also get some time off between each stage of initiation."

The phrase "do whatever you like" sticks in my mind. At home, I could never do what I wanted, not even for an evening. I had to think of other people's needs first. I don't even know what I like to do other than running. Gia had mentioned at dinner getting in more training time. Maybe I will join her in the mornings.

"You are only permitted to leave the compound when accompanied by a Dauntless," Eric adds. "Behind this door is the room where you will be sleeping for the next few weeks. You will notice there are eleven beds and only ten of you. We anticipated that a higher proportion of you would make it this far."

"But we started with thirteen," protests Christina. I close my eyes and wait for the reprimand. She needs to learn to stay quiet. And she said we had a death wish.

"There is always at least one transfer who doesn't make it to the compound," Eric says as he is picking at his cuticles. He shrugs. "Anyways, in the first stage of initiation, we keep transfers and Dauntless-born initiates separate but that doesn't mean you are evaluated separately. At the end of initiation, your rankings will be determined in comparison with the Dauntless-born initiates. And they are better than you already. So I expect-"

" _Rankings?_ " asks the mousy-haired Erudite girl to my right. "Why are we ranked?"

Eric smiles, and in the blue light, his smile looks even more wicked.

"Your ranking serves two purposes," he says. "The first is that it determines the order in which you will select a job after initiation. There are only a few _desirable_ positions available."

My stomach tightens. I know by looking at his smile, like I knew the second I entered the aptitude test room, that something bad is about to happen.

"The second purpose," he says, "is that only the top twelve initiates are made members."

Pain stabs my stomach. We all stand still as statues but I feel Gia's hand brushing mine. Offering support and I grasp it tightly. " _What_?" Christina gasps out.

"There are eleven Dauntless-borns, and ten of you," Eric continues. "Four initiates will be cut at the end of stage one. The remainder will be cut after the final test."

That means that even if we make it through each stage of initiation, nine initiates will not be members. I see Christina look at me from the corner of my eyes but I can't look back at her. I don't need to because Gia has already turned her glare on her.

I know what she, as well as the others, are thinking. My odds as the smallest initiate, as the only Abnegation transfer, are not good. Or so they think. Gia squeezes my hand as if sensing my thoughts.

"What do we do if we're cut?" Peter asks.

"You leave the Dauntless compound," Eric replies indifferently, "and live factionless."

The mousy-haired girl clamps her hand over her mouth and stifles a sob. I remember the factionless man with the grey teeth, snatching the bag of apples from my hands. His dull, staring eyes. I remember a dozen other incidents over the years and the attacks from the factionless on members of my faction. Instead of crying, like the Erudite girl, I feel colder. Harder.

I will be a member. I will.

"But that's….not fair!." The broad-shouldered Candor girl, Molly, cries out. Even though she sounds angry, she looks terrified. "If we had _known_ -"

"Are you saying that if you had known this before the Choosing Ceremony, you wouldn't have chosen Dauntless?" Eric snaps. "Because if that's the case, you should get out now. If you are really one of us, it won't matter to you that you might fail. And if it does, you are a coward."

Eric pushes the door to the dormitory open.

"You chose us," he says. "Now we have to choose you."

 _Gia's POV_

I lie in bed and listen to ten people breathing. I can tell by the pace and sound of it how many are really asleep. There are less than four that are asleep and that can most be attributed to one thing.

The fucking crying Candor!

I can tell Tris beside me isn't sleeping. After Eric had left I had a talk with her. She would be joining me for a run and some training before the real training began, she would need it.

I had also helped her to realize that she needed to shed Abnegation completely. I don't want her to change her giving ways so much as I need her to embrace her Dauntless side now. It will make the second stage so much easier for her and me by default.

So when she would have slept in her old Abnegation clothes and not changed into the Dauntless ones before the talk, she had set her chin and back then changed right along with me.

I was going to need to get her better clothes though. She is so darn tiny and the clothes just swallow her up.

My thoughts turn to Eric. I am so pissed at myself for being so happy to see him. Pissed at him for going back on what we had resolved to do, to not be anyone's tool or goon.

How was it possible to think someone looked so disgusting and incredibly hot at the same time? That was all I had been able to think from the moment he had come through that hole.

The fact that he had made himself a caricature of what a Dauntless is just pissed me off. I would bet anything he had done it on orders too. Make himself look so far removed from what an Erudite would ever dream of looking like so that it drove the memory of his faction of origin from the mind completely.

I recognized the tactic and while yes, that part turned me on, I didn't like that he had just fucking complied with it and went so damn far.

Then him demanding that I meet with him tonight while everyone was asleep. Like I was going to even contemplate being alone with him.

Actually that is just what I was doing. As much as I wanted to hate him and as much as I knew I couldn't trust him…..I still wanted him so badly.

Jeanine had kept us away from each other for that last year when it was determined he would be transferring. Then she had made sure that anytime Eric was going to be anywhere near Erudite or the sector, I was busy on some training or bullshit mission.

Dinner was the first time I had seen Eric in three years and everything in my body and heart was screaming at me to follow his request and meet him.

They would both get me killed if I listened to them though. Jeanine was not going to be happy that I had transferred. I had played the role and never let on that I was so not on board with any of her plans. She didn't know exactly how far I was already in bringing her down and it needed to stay that way.

So I had told him as much. Sitting there at the table an entire conversation and arguing had occurred and no one had known. I had thought Four at least might know Morse code. Then again he was rather focused on Tris so maybe he was distracted.

I knew that wouldn't be the end of the discussion with Eric. He had even said as much. I hadn't expected him to decide he suddenly wanted to be involved with the entire training. He wasn't supposed to get involved until the second or third stage.

I sighed with a scowl forming at how hard it was going to be to hold myself from him, or just hold myself from kicking his ass, during training. He already figured this and was no doubt the reason for his sudden involvement.

A thought occurred to me though. Jeanine wouldn't have and will not approve of that move. He would be defying orders already because there was no way she wanted him anywhere near me for long periods of time.

She had known that Eric and I had gotten close, attached to one another over the years, after we were paired together. We were and had always been a perfect team. One of her best. We also had been in love. Something that was forbidden among the children of her project.

It had enraged her more than I had ever seen too, when she found out that we had become intimate. She would be livid when she found out he had made it so that he was once again going to be near me.

Maybe there was hope for him…..

I scowl at myself and shake my head. I couldn't afford to think or hope for that. It would get, not only me dead, but my objectives. They and saving the city were all that mattered now.

I rolled over to try and get some sleep, hoping by doing that I wouldn't be tempted to find Eric.

The stupid hulk of a Candor was making that all but impossible.

"If he doesn't shut the…" I grumble quietly but hear Tris beside mutter an agreement.

Sighing, I jump up and stand beside his bed. "What's your name Candy?"

I am not exactly loud but not quiet either.

He sniffles and turns towards me. "Al."

I shake my head at his sniffling. "Why did you come to Dauntless? And don't say because the test told you...because I already know that would be a lie."

He jerks in surprise and looks at me. "Because I thought it would make them proud of me for once. For me to do something useful."

I groan and run a hand over my face and nod. "Then you need to remember that. Visualize it right now and everyday. See them smiling at you with pride as you wear the Dauntless uniform and believe that they are and will be. Until you can do that then you will be miserable here. And Al, if you can't cry quietly or not at all...then find someplace else to do it. I will not have you disturbing the few hours of sleep we have left to us before we have training tomorrow. Have I made myself clear?" I demand this at the end in a hard voice.

"Yes….yes ma'am." He gets out as he swallows and nods.

"Good. Now, I am going to go to sleep." I mutter before I head back to bed and slip in.

His sobs and sniffling had stopped and quiet resumed but I heard several, 'thank the gods', being muttered around the room.

I hope what I said helped but I doubt it would.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thanks so much for the views, reviews, follows and faves already! I am having fun with this and it is helping to recharge my creative batteries on a few other stories as well. So thanks and I hope you keep on enjoying!**

 **Disclaimer:** ** _"Mother is the name for God in the lips and hearts of all children." (James O'Barr, The Crow) V Roth is Mother to this world and I am just one of the children singing my own tune into the night._**

 **Chapter 4**

Tris' POV

"The first thing you will learn today is how to shoot a gun. The second thing is how to win a fight." Four presses a gun into my palm without looking at me and keeps walking. "Thankfully, if you are here you already know how to get on and off a moving train. So I don't need to teach you that."

I am not surprised that the Dauntless expect us to hit the ground running. This morning Gia had warned me that I could expect to have to fight, if not the first day, then the next.

She had worked me on the bags after a warm up and showed me some good kicks and moves to use but warned me not to use them around the rest of the class. Everything she shows me I won't use until I fight. She said them underestimating me would be their downfall and I couldn't help but to feel pride in her faith in me.

She is scary when she trains. Her eyes go intense and hard. She isn't unkind really just, deadly serious. I guess, knowing what I know about what will happen if I fail, I can understand it. It is deadly serious because it could mean my death in a literal way.

My body is straining from all the work we put in but the food she made me eat just before we came back for the group training helped. That is another thing she said I was just going to have to get over. I find I don't mind it so much when she explains things. There is something she keeps saying though that makes me wonder. She keeps insisting I need to see things as a Dauntless, and only a Dauntless. I am trying to understand what she means but also why she keeps insisting on that.

"Initiation is divided into three stages. We will measure your progress and rank you according to your performance in each stage. The stages are not weighed equally in determining your final rank, so it is possible, though difficult, to drastically improve your rank over time."

I stare at the weapon in my hand. In my time imagining myself as a Dauntless, I don't know that I saw myself holding one let alone firing one. The idea and feeling doesn't feel foreign to me exactly though.

"We believe that preparation eradicates cowardice, which we define as the failure to act in the midst of fear," says Four. "Therefore each stage of initiation is intended to prepare you in a different way. The first stage is primarily physical; the second, primarily emotional; the third, primarily mental."

"But what…" Peter yawns through his words. "What does firing a gun have to do with...bravery?"

Four flips the gun in his hand, presses the barrel to Peter's forehead, and clicks a bullet into place. Peter freezes with his lips parted, the yawn dead in his mouth.

"Wake. Up." Four snaps. "You are holding a loaded gun, you idiot. Act like it."

He lowers the gun. Once the immediate threat is gone, Peter's eyes harden. I'm surprised he can stop himself from responding, after speaking his mind all his life in Candor, but he does, his cheeks red.

"And to answer your question...you are far less likely to soil your pants and cry for your mother if you're prepared to defend yourself." Four stops walking at the end of the row and turns on his heel. "This is also information you may need later in stage one. So, watch me."

He faces the wall with the targets on it - one square of plywood with three red circles on it for each of us. He stands with his feet apart, holds the gun in both hands, and fires. The bang is so loud it hurts my ears. I crane my neck to look at the target. The bullet went through the middle of the circle.

I turn to my own target. My family would never approve of me firing a gun. They would say that guns are used for self-defence, if not violence, and therefore are self-serving.

Gia's words come to mind and I shake my head. That is the Abnegation way of looking at it though. Then my mother's face comes to mind with her proud smile, her lifted chin. She knew what I would be doing, what I would be facing. And she not only approved but was proud.

I hold that image along with Gia's words and I grip my gun more firmly. I set my feet shoulder-width apart and wrap my hands around the handle of the gun. It is heavy but not unmanageable. I take a look to my right and look at Gia. She is waiting on me but is showing me the posture.

She wants me to pull the gun firmly into my shoulder. Press it right against it. Her legs are slightly bent, telling me that I will need to do this instead of locking them straight up.

She gives me a nod towards the target and I nod back. I squeeze the trigger and am surprised at how much resistance it gives me. It makes me think that you have to commit to this. To pull the trigger and know what you are doing.

It should weigh on me that I could one day be pulling the trigger to end a life. Instead it is a relief. Because it lets me know this isn't a casual act and one that can be done so easily. Everytime I pull this trigger will be for a purpose and will never be one taken lightly.

The sound still hurts my ears and I am shocked by the recoil, but I take it well. My shoulder will feel it and I have a feeling I will have some bruising there, but I smile when a bullet hole appears at the edge of the target.

I look to Gia and see she has gotten two bullets off in the time it took me to get one and both are dead center. I should be upset or even maybe shocked. I am neither. I don't begrudge her success because I know she is driving mine.

"How did you do that?" Will asks incredulously. At first I am thinking that he is talking to Gia but I see he is looking at me.

"How did I do what?" I ask mystified.

"Get it on the first try? I have fired twice and haven't come close yet. Everything I am doing is exactly what Four showed us." I can tell he isn't doubting my ability but is upset that he isn't perfect at something the first time.

He must have been back in his old faction.

I shrug and see Four walking down towards us. "I can't follow exactly what Four showed us because I am not built exactly like Four. Did you notice how much you were pushed back after firing? Imagine being my size and getting that same force. I had to adjust for my size."

I can see Gia smirking at me and then motioning for me to do it again. So I lift up my gun, cheeks turning red that Four is now watching us. She lifts her gun up as well but I think more to make it so he has two things to look at. So that I am not his sole focus.

I take aim and fire but this time I am just to the outside and down a little of the center target. I get a rush of energy and forget about being watched as I fire again and get to just at the red line that forms the circle of the center target. The next shot lands in the center of the target. I fire again quickly and land another one to almost the exact same spot.

I lower the gun as I feel the energy and warmth coursing through me. There is power in controlling something that can do so much damage. In controlling something period.

I smile widely when I realize that I am thinking like a Dauntless. I am thinking like one because I belong here.

By the time we break for lunch, my arms throb from holding up the gun and my fingers are hard to straighten but I am smiling as I walk with Gia. I massage them on my way to the dining hall.

"You are doing really well, Tris. More than really well." Gia says as she beams over at me. I can't help but smile back at her and shrug.

"Well, I can't take the credit, Gia. You have been helping me." I sigh a little at that and wonder how my first days would have gone without her with me.

Gia scoffs over at me. "On the roof, what was your initial reaction to the gun when it was put in your hands?"

We sit down and begin to make up plates for ourselves. Christina sits beside me but isn't all too close. She doesn't care for Gia and I could see she was jealous of how well even I did with the weapons today. She invited Al to sit with us. I don't hate Al but I also can't bring myself to like him much. Not after hearing his reason for being here or his sobs.

I tilt my head in thought at Gia's question. "My first reaction? It was odd because it didn't feel foreign to me really. I remember thinking that in all my time dreaming of being here that I didn't give holding a gun any thought. It felt powerful and dangerous but not wrong."

Gia smirks and nods. "What about when you went to fire it and position it? What were you thinking then?"

"Well, at first my family flashed through my mind but I quickly dismissed that. It is also funny because...my mom flashed through my mind. Before she walked away from me she told me to be brave and that I was her daughter after all. I think she was Dauntless. When we left the ceremony...I saw pride on her face. So between that and what you said I could feel something….click for me. It was like I didn't need to worry about what they would have said because they aren't here anymore. I can be who I should be."

Gia's eyebrow quirks and I can see something flash in her eyes. Triumph maybe? For sure pride but then she shrugs. "You are picking that up probably faster than most of the others will. You are also right. What else?"

She takes a bite of her own food waiting for me to swallow my bite and answer. I chew my lip in thought for a moment. "I know you were giving me pointers just by staying in that stance. I guess though I had to put it all together myself to get it to work for me. You are still taller though not as tall as Four. You also have more weight than me so even though you helped it was up to me to finish it out."

"Damn straight, Tris! Don't let anyone take your accomplishments from you. I didn't aim that gun for you. I didn't tell you about the breathing that you figured out later or the pressure on the trigger. That was all you. Don't let someone else's jealousy take away from what you do on your own and making your place here." She says this last bit and sends hard eyes to Chris who had been a little bitchy earlier on the walk to the dining hall.

If Chris heard, she doesn't act like it. In fact she avoids looking at Gia all together.

"Oh, come on. You don't remember me?" Christina asks Al as she makes herself another sandwich. "We were in Math together just a few _days_ ago. And I am _not_ a quiet person."

"I slept through Math most of the time," Al replies. "It was first hour!" He exclaims at my rolling of eyes and Gia's snort of disgust.

"What about you? Do you remember ever taking a class with me Tris?" She asks and avoids looking at Gia again as she faces me. "I mean, no offense, but I probably wouldn't remember if you did. All the Abnegation looked the same to me. I mean, they still do, but now you're not one of them."

I stare at her wide eyed and disbelieving her rudeness. I can't even reply but Gia has no problem.

"I have a question for you, Christina. Do you ever remove your head enough from your ass to actually use that brain of yours? Or how about this, is there a fucking off switch in there somewhere that I can flip to allow at least a five second delay so that you think before you speak?" Her eyes had gone to that place that I find beautiful and scary all at the same time.

I see Chris gulp and pale significantly. "Sorry. I guess I am being rude. I'm used to just saying whatever is on my mind. Mom used to say that politeness is deception in pretty packaging."

"You aren't in Candor anymore Christina. A slip of the tongue or saying something rude to the wrong person can get you dead here." Gia's voice isn't hateful or even full of rage. It is somber, serious and grave. Her eyes are still the hurricane swirling around the deadly calm.

If anything could have made an impression on the young Candor, it was that tone with those eyes. It was a warning and a promise. Not a threat from her but letting her know she needed to take care.

Chris trembles before she lets out a shaky breath and nods.

Gia nods back and motions for her to continue to eat. I often wonder what Gia's life was like in Erudite. Especially in moments like these. She cares, I know she does, especially about me. She has tried everything she could before we came to prepare me. Now that I am here and I see Four in action, I see that she has so much of the same demeanor.

Was she trained or how much did she train before coming here? And why? Why was she so insistent that I only think like a Dauntless? She gets so firm and serious when telling me that. I wonder if she knows, and if she knows…..does anyone else?

I frown at my thought and try to break the tension a little. "I think that's why our factions don't usually associate with each other." I give a short laugh.

Candor and Abnegation don't hate each other the way Erudite and Abnegation do but they avoid each other. Candor's real problem is with Amity. Those who seek peace above all else, they say, will deceive to keep the water calm.

"Can I sit here?" Will asks as he taps the table with his finger.

"What, you don't want to hang out with your Erudite buddies?" Chris asks with a shy smile.

She might have been playing but Will casts a look to her and shakes his head.

"They aren't my buddies," says Will, setting his plate down. "As Gia can tell you, just because we were in the same faction doesn't mean we get along. Gia and I, yeah we are buddies." He grins and winks at Gia who snorts and rolls her eyes. But she smiles at him with the closest thing to affection, besides to me, that I have seen her ever have on her face.

He shrugs as he makes his own plate and misses the frown and flash of jealousy that moves over Chris' face. "Plus, Edward and Myra are dating, and I would rather not be the third wheel."

Gia shakes her head with a sigh. "I wish she would have gotten her head out of her ass and not followed him here."

Will nods and frowns. "I know they have been together forever but I would think that…." He stopped and looked to Gia and his eyes were serious. "They are cutting Gia and we already knew that before we came here. Well I mean at least we heard rumors of it. And he still let her come?"

Chris frowns and looks between the two. "Why is it bad she came here with him?"

Will sees the look flashing across Gia's face and turns to Chris. He frowns at her and tilts his head. "Well for one she doesn't have an ounce of Dauntless in her. For another, he has been preparing to come here since he was ten and they have been together since they were fourteen. In all that time she never tried to prepare at all. She won't be able to make it here but he let her come anyways. Knowing she wouldn't be happy and that she wouldn't even make it."

I can't help but frown and look at the two. Edward and Myra sit two tables away, so close they bump elbows as they cut their food. Myra pauses to kiss Edward. I watch them carefully. I've only seen a few kisses in my life.

Edward turns his head and presses his lips to Myra's. I feel my anger rise in me. I see how much she adores him and yes I can see he does too. But if you knew that the person wouldn't be happy or that they could be made factionless should you still let them follow you? My anger boils and I blurt out something in my anger.

"Do they have to be so _public_?" I grit out.

"She just kissed him." Al frowns at me and it pisses me off more. When he frowns, his thick eyebrows touch his eyelashes. "It's not like they're stripping naked."

"A kiss is not something you do in public." I stand my ground at being pissed off at the couple.

"Your Abnegation is show….." Chris starts to say and gets the glare from Gia and me.

I shrug and take a bite of my food, chew then swallow. I calm myself enough to try and reply. "I guess I will just have to get over it then."

I am not talking about the public display of affection, but more about the fact that he had just signed her death warrant basically.

Gia nods and shrugs too. "Their choice."

Al shakes his head and looks confused. "Wait...What?"

Will rolls his eyes but then smirks over to me and goes back to the subject of the PDA. "Or you can stay frigid." His green eyes are glinting with mischief and laughter. "You know, if you want."

He obviously gets what I am upset about and that I was wanting to move the subject along.

Christina throws a roll at him. He catches it and bites it.

"Don't be mean to her," she says. "Frigidity is in her nature. Sort of like being a know-it-all is in yours."

"I am not _frigid_!" I exclaim.

"Don't worry about it," says Will. "It's endearing. Look, you're all red."

The comment only makes my face hotter. Not all from embarrassment either. Everyone else, but Gia chuckles. She is watching me but staying quiet, letting me handle this one. I force a laugh and after a few seconds it comes naturally.

I could get all offended about nothing or take it like it was meant, as a joke.

After lunch, Four leads us to a new room. It's huge with a wood floor that is cracked and creaky. It has a large circled painted in the middle. On the left wall is a green board- a chalkboard. My Lower Levels teacher used one, but I haven't seen one since then. Maybe it has something to do with Dauntless priorities: training comes first, technology comes second.

Our names are written on the board in alphabetical order. Hanging at three-foot intervals along one end of the room are faded black punching bags.

We line up behind them and Four stands in the middle where we can all see him.

"As I said this morning," says Four, "next you will learn how to fight. The purpose of this is to prepare you to act; to prepare your body to respond to threats and challenges - which you will need, if you intend to survive life as a Dauntless."

He says this with such sombre seriousness that I can't help but remember Gia's words about the life expectancy rate and then her words to Chris as well. I resolve that I will not only survive but I will thrive.

I will be a Dauntless member. I just have to remember to not show the things Gia is teaching me.

"We will go over technique today, and tomorrow you will start to fight each other." Four states firmly. "So I recommend that you pay attention. Those who don't learn fast will get hurt."

Four names a few different punches, demonstrating each one as he does, first against the air and then against the punching bag.

I catch on as we practice. Like with the gun I just need to stop and think about how it works best for me. I also need a few tries to get it. The kicks I excel at but I am trying to pull back. I can see Gia keeping an eye on me from on the side of me.

All around me is the sound of skin hitting tough fabric and just like this morning I remember Gia's hands. She has been doing this for as long as she can remember she said. She also said she would be getting some cream that helps to toughen up the hands but not take away the damage. The callouses, she said, help. Getting rid of them will only make the pain last. For a minute, I remember Eric's hands. How cracked and disgusting I had thought they were. I thought they were disgusting because it reminded me how brutal he seemed with them like that. I still don't like him and he still creeps me out but it makes me wonder if the hands here mark how good the fighter is?

Four wanders through the crowd of initiates, watching us as we go through the movements again. He stops by Gia and watches her for a little while. I can see his forehead creasing and I can't blame him. She is a flurry and while I have to hold back on the moves, she said there was no point in her doing so.

I also think she is not holding back on purpose. The more she stands out the more people pay attention to her, allowing me to slip by under the radar.

I can't decide if that line of thought is Dauntless or Erudite like and then something else strikes me. How many people walking around here have Erudite thoughts or tendencies, they just can masquerade as Dauntless because in essence they are brutal? Brutality doesn't make them Dauntless though.

I will need to ask Gia about this.

He had apparently had a few words with Gia and he looked to be debating something. Whatever he had been contemplating, he decided against it and shook his head then moved on.

When he stops in front of me, my insides twist like someone's stirring them with a fork. He stares at me, his eyes following my body from my head to my feet, not lingering anywhere. I see that he is trying to make it look like a practical, scientific gaze, it feels anything but. Maybe he really is just trying to ascertain my ability. But the way just a look from him can make me feel like he is looking at me in different way than I have ever wanted or experienced leaves me breathless.

"You don't have much muscle," he says, "which means you're better off using your knees and elbows. You can put more power behind them."

Suddenly he presses a hand to my stomach. His fingers are so long that, though the heel of his hand touches one side of my rib cage, his fingertips still touch the other side. My heart pounds so hard my chest hurts, and I stare at him. My eyes should be wide. I should be shocked but I am not. I just feel warmth and little jolts. I feel my eyes get a little heavier.

"Never forget to keep tension here," he says in a quiet voice but it is husky, like last night, and his already beautiful dark blue eyes are even darker. His nostrils are flared slightly.

Before I can register much more or even say anything he lifts his hand and keeps walking. I feel the pressure of his palm even after he's gone. It's strange, but I have to stop and breathe for a few seconds before I can keep practicing again.

When Four dismisses us for dinner, Christina nudges me with her elbow.

"I'm surprised he didn't break you in half," she says. She wrinkles her nose. "He scares the hell out of me. It's the quiet voice he uses."

I feel defensive of him but I am still a little stunned thinking about him and what he made me feel. "Yeah. He's…" I look over my shoulder at him. He is quiet, and remarkably self-possessed. But I wasn't afraid that he would hurt me. I wasn't afraid at all. "...definitely intimidating." I finally get out.

Gia giggles and links her arm with mine, smirking over at me. Trust her to not miss anything about that. Another thing I would need to talk to her about.

Al, who was in front of us, turns around once we reach the pit and announces. "I want to get a tattoo."

From behind us, Will asks, "A tattoo of what?"

"I don't know." Al laughs and looks pointedly to Gia. "I want to get something that will remind me of why I came. That alone, wasn't enough. I need to want this for myself. I need to want to be brave and give this everything. Right now I feel like I have a foot in Candor and a foot in Dauntless. I just want to feel like I have left there for good."

Gia tilts her head in thought and smiles before she gives him an approving nod. Maybe there is hope for Al yet, if he means what he says.

"I think you are right. If we want all the way in, we should look the part." Christina says and gives me a look.

Both Gia and I stiffen before Gia growls a little. I squeeze her arm and shake my head.

"No. I will not cut my hair." I say firmly. "I will not dye it a strange color or pierce my face. If and when I do anything I will give it thought and it will mean something."

"How about your bellybutton?" She asks.

"How about you pierce your nipple Christina?" Will says with a smirk, drawing attention from me and throwing her challenge back at her.

Gia and I join Will in laughing at how her forehead crinkles and her skin darkens.

Now that training is done for the day we can do whatever we want until it's time to sleep. The idea makes me feel almost giddy although that might be from fatigue.

The pit is swarming with people. Christina actually asks Gia her request and I want to laugh at how conditioned and scared she has Chris. She wants to go to the clothing store and Gia says that we need to get more training clothing anyways. Mine, I found, were annoying during the physical portion of the day. They were so baggy and kept getting twisted around.

I nod and allow Chris to pull me along with her while Gia follows with a smile. I had cast her a pleading look but she shrugged and smirked at me. Telling me if I didn't like it, do something about it.

When we get into the store though I start putting my foot down at most of the dresses she tries to foist on me. I do end up putting on one that I liked. I ended up with a knee-length black dress. The skirt isn't full but it isn't stuck to my thighs, either- unlike the others she picked out for me. Gia and I hit the racks and found a few ourselves.

When I have the dress on and am standing in front of the mirror Chris slips the tie from my hair and I shake it out of its braid so it hangs wavy off my shoulders.

She holds up a black pencil. "Eyeliner."

"You aren't going to be able to make me pretty you know." I close my eyes and hold still. She runs the tip of the pencil along the line of my eyelashes.

"Who cares about pretty? I am going for noticeable."

"Gods are you a bitch about compliments even? How about this, Tris is more noticeable than you could ever fucking hope to be with that attitude. Tris, you are fucking stunning even without all of this. The only thing I can agree about her words is who cares about pretty? Pretty is for Amity or Erudite. You are Dauntless and fierce first, stunning second." Gia adds and when I open my eyes I stare openly at my own reflection.

My heart rate picks up as I do like I am breaking the rules, but I like it. I smile at Chris thanks for the help and Gia for her compliment. That meant a lot to me.

I didn't feel like it was 'blowing smoke up my ass', as she would say. She didn't do that. Now that I think about, Gia could be as truthful as a Candor. She just knew when and where to aim it.

Right now she spoke the truth of what she saw. I can see by Chris' eyes she agrees but she isn't saying much as I turn my head this way and that.

"You like it?" She asks finally.

"Yeah!" I nod with a smile. "I look like a different person."

She laughs. "That a good thing or a bad thing?"

I look at myself head on again and get caught up at being able to really look at myself for more than just a few seconds.

"A good thing," I shake my head. "Sorry, I've just never been allowed to stare at my reflection for this long."

"Really?" Christina shakes her head. "Abnegation is a strange faction, I have to tell you."

I roll my eyes as I get up, already feeling Gia's growl building. So I grab her Gia's arm and toss the bag with my new clothes over my shoulder as I pull her to the door with me.

"Let's go watch Al get tattooed." I say. I might have left my old faction behind but I don't want to criticize it yet. I don't want the fight I know Gia has to be itching for, to break out….yet.

Chris follows behind us as we walk ahead and I turn to Gia. "You didn't want to put on the dress you found?"

She smirked and shook her head. "No, I am fine with the just pants and tank I found. I can save the dress for something other than going to see someone get tattooed, then dinner and bed."

I shake my head with a smile. Her 'pants and tank' are nothing but just that. They are black leather pants with the sides done in some kind of studs paired with a backless black tank top and some kind of tube top under that is a blood red color. She had made us both get some kind of girl underwear but not much because she said it was pointless to get a lot right now.

She had done her own make up and let her blond hair down to hang to her shoulder blades in its natural curls. Gia was stunning herself with her almond skin against the golden blonde hair and amber gold eyes.

When we get to the tattoo parlor Al is sitting in the chair already and a small narrow man with more ink than bare skin is drawing a spider on his arm.

Will and Christina flip through the books of pictures. They elbow each other playfully every once in awhile when they find a good one. I can tell that Chris might be flirting while Will is more being friendly.

I wander around the room, looking at the artwork on the walls. Gia had moved off to look at something. She said something about liking what Will had mentioned earlier and then wandered off.

I am captivated by the room. These days the only artists are in Amity. Abnegation sees art as impractical and its appreciation as time that could be spent serving others. So though I have seen works of art in textbooks I have never been in decorated room before.

It makes the air feel close and warm, and I could get lost here for hours without noticing. I skim the wall with my fingertips. A picture of a hawk on one wall reminds me of Tori's tattoo. Beneath it is a sketch of a bird in flight.

"It's a raven," a voice behind me says. "Pretty, right?"

I turn to see Tori standing there. I feel like I am back in the aptitude test room, with the mirrors all around me and the wires connected to my forehead. I didn't expect to see her again.

"Well, hello there." She smiles. "Never thought I would see you again. Beatrice, is it?"

"Tris, actually," I say. "Do you work here?"

"I do. I just took a break to administer the tests. Most of the time I'm here." She taps her chin. "I recognize that name. You were the first jumper, weren't you?"

"Yes, I was."

"Well done."

"Thanks." I touch the sketch of the bird. "Listen -I need to talk to you about…" I glance over at Will and Christina. I can't corner Tori now; they'll ask questions. "...something. Sometime."

"I am not sure that would be wise," she says quietly. "I helped you as much as I could, and now you will have to go it alone."

I purse my lips. She has answers; I know she does. If she won't give them to me now, I will have to find a way to make her tell me some other time.

"Want a tattoo?" She asks.

The bird to sketch holds my attention. I never intended to get pierced or tattooed when I came here. I wanted to plan things out a little more. But I understand now what Tori said about her tattoo representing a fear she overcame. A reminder of where she was, as well as a reminder of where she is now. Maybe there is a way to honor my old life as I embrace my new one.

"Yes." I reply. "Three of these flying birds."

I touch my collarbone, marking the path of their flight - toward my heart. One for each member of the family I left behind.

 _Gia's POV_

She was coming around. Better than I could ever hoped for and faster than I had planned. This is all for the best though. The sooner I know she can fit in faster, then I can start my other work.

I feel comfortable in being able to leave her for a little bit. I really do want to check out something and I need to arrange it to be someone specific that does it.

Tris had found something and was getting it tattooed on her. I caught a little of the conversation that Tori was trying not to have with Tris. I try to not be pissed at what she tells her. Try and fail. I need to keep calm and not let it affect how I handle Tori and my plans for her. She is the first piece in this and I can't let my temper or disgust at her actions get in the way.

I plaster a smile on my face as I join Tris as she is getting tattooed. "Look at you Tris. Already showing up all the other transfers in more ways then one with how Dauntless you are."

Tris blushes and smiles at me. "I think you might have the market cornered on that one, Gia."

I scoff at her and plop down as I eye Tori, who is very interested in the conversation so far. Which was my plan but I also need to be careful not to get carried away.

"Ability does not equate bravery. I had the advantage of learning skills because Erudite has all the shit for me to do it. Something I have found about us Erudites that transfer over though, Tris. We don't learn bravery, the true meaning of it, until shit is on the line. You might have a leg up on us in that respect. You are built and made to protect. Every instinct you have sends you down that path. Erudite….every instinct we have is to first protect our own asses then maybe protect others. Hard instinct to overcome. I just hope it doesn't cost family...or I mean someone I see as family, because I would rather save my own skin then someone elses. I don't know how a person lives through that."

I might have gone to far. Judging by the shaking that Tori's hands end up doing as she starts to clean Tris' tattoo. I kept my voice even and I made sure not to look at Tori pointedly during this little whammy. But I have her shaken...good. Now when I spring my trap on her later she will be so mired in guilt I can get her to cooperate.

"You're all set." Tori informs Tris with a strained smile.

Tris is looking contemplative at my words but she also knows something is up. She so much smarter than she gives herself credit for or even realizes.

She gives me a brief questioning look and then smiles to Tori. "Thanks."

Tori tries to avoid my eyes but finally she looks to me and smiles. "Was there something I can do for you?"

I smile widely because she is exactly who I need for this. "Yes. I was told that what I want though has to be taken to some back room."

Realization dawns on her and she smiles genuinely then looks to Tris. Tris chews her lip and is blushing. "I don't want to know do I?"

I shrug and laugh. "For this we are going to say baby steps. I will met you at dinner."

With a nod Tris hops up and goes to join Will, Chris and Al. Will casts a look to me but laughs when Tris says something to him, turning red.

"It is just back this way." Tori points to the backroom that I will need to go to for my turn.

When we get in I hop up onto the table that is there while she closes the door.

"So what exactly am I doing for you today?" Tori asks with a smirk.

"I want to get my nipples pierced." I reply excitedly. I really am excited about that but I also have a purpose for having her do this.

She laughs and nods. "Good call on sending Tris away then."

I shrug. "Honestly, I think she would have been fine. She is a tough girl and all Dauntless. Or at least much more Dauntless than people are going to give her credit for at first."

Tori starts to get things ready and has her back turned to me as I whip my tops and bra off then lay back. "It sounds as if you know her pretty well. But if you were Erudite then that can't be possible."

She starts turns to face me and hasn't looked up yet as she lays out all the items she will need, including the bar piercings, that will be put in. When she finally does look up she notices exactly what I wanted and needed her to see.

Her eyes widen and she gasps causing me to smile wickedly as I answer. "I do know her very, very well Victoria."

Her eyes snap up to mine and there is a clatter of instruments that fall to the ground. "How do you...how did you? Did they send you? Are you going to kill me?"

I tilt my head as if in thought then I shake it. Not even I want to be that cruel even knowing what she did. "Trust me Tori, if I wanted you dead you would be. They didn't send me. I sent myself but it won't be long before they start sending people. Or at the very least giving out the orders."

She shakes her head and takes in the tattoo that is on my left side, ribs down to my hip and curving under my breast. It is that of a tribal style japanese dragon. That in itself isn't what has her rattled but who has the matching one and who drew and inked them on us. It would be impossible for her not to recognize his work.

"How do you even have that? It shouldn't be possible! He is dead and you wouldn't have been old enough when that happened." She asks tears in her eyes.

"I can tell you Tori. I can answer those questions and more but I want something in return. You have to make the decision though if this time you are willing to do more than just protect your own ass or are you finally willing to embrace your Dauntless and protect others." My voice is soft and my eyes are the cold and deadly eyes that I know can go menacing. They aren't that way right now. Not yet. That is my last card to play if she doesn't cooperate.

"How do I know you aren't with _him_?" She asks with a snarl.

"I can understand your hate for our respective former faction, Victoria. I really can but there are plenty of things you don't and never will know unless you start to look at things with that Erudite mind and not the bitterness, guilt and hate. You were used. Did it ever occur to you that he might be being used too?"

"You aren't defending him to me. If you have that tattoo then you know how he is." She spat at me.

"Then it should tell you as well that I am not that far the fuck behind him, considering that I have a matching tattoo. If I wanted you dead Tori, you would be dead before you could blink. And I would make it look like a fucking freak piercing accident if I wanted to. I can still, if you don't wipe that attitude from your face and look at how I approached things here. Who was I sitting out there with, Tori? Does it sound like I want to protect or kill?"

This breaks through to her and she starts to try and breath to calm herself. "You care for her?"

I nod but my eyes are still watching her closely and are still deadly. "I do."

"Why?"

"Not important, or at least not to you. The why isn't important here. What is important is that I am not just trying to protect her alone. She isn't the first nor the last that I have and will protect."

She looks to the ground for a very long time and I can see it connecting for her. The tattoo, where I am from, who designed it…..

"He isn't dead?" She whispers hopefully.

I smile sadly and shake my head. "He isn't. Rather he wasn't the last I saw of him. I don't know where he is now. It wasn't my job to monitor him after I got him out of there."

She finally raises her eyes to meet mine and I can see that part of her that had been guilt ridden and dead inside was slowly ebbing. "What do you want me to do?"

I grin a little wickedly and shrug. "For now I want to get my piercings. The next part will come soon. If Tris comes back to you again though and wants information, how about you do the right thing, yeah?" The last was formed as a question but it wasn't. It was an order and I could see she understood but also saw the guilt of her refusal earlier flashed through her eyes as well.

"Understood." She gave a firm nod.

I nodded to and motioned for her to begin the piercings. When she was done I informed her I would be back for a tattoo and would be asking Tris to come along on that day. The plan was for her to also suggest talking to me. Once she did, I could take over in preparing Tris.

I was satisfied and smiling as I made my way down to dinner. I got piercings I had always thought about and the first of many crucial steps and people have been taken care of.

Hopefully before fights started or were scheduled to end, I could have started to work with those that needed to be coached. I just needed the next few steps to go well for that to happen.

 _Eric's POV_

She refused to see me. Flat out had told me to go to hell and it wasn't happening. I shouldn't be surprised or hurt but I am. Why it still hurt after three years of radio silence from her I don't know. Of being told by Jeanine that she wouldn't see me for some damn reason, it destroyed and enraged me.

She had no right to be here or look the way she did. She had no right to look at me as if I was some piece of filth.

I can admit I have gone overboard in the piercings. I can admit that at first it had been something Jeanine had suggested. Leadership, or Max rather, seemed to change his attitude to me and saw me as more Dauntless the more I changed. That had been how it started.

Then it had gotten mixed up with the fear being so pierced inspired in others along with the pain from the piercings. The pain that helped me to forget how miserable and angry I was here and with what I was assigned to do. How angry I was that I was always being compared to fucking Four. Even Jeanine did it. She never seemed to miss an opportunity to remind me of my near failure and wondering if he wouldn't be the better option for her.

All the piercings in the world, all the tattoos I got inked, wouldn't take away the fact that I have missed her and felt like there was nothing but a big hole in my heart just eating away at me. It was all her fault too! She was the one that ended things and went back on her fucking promise. She said if we got separated it wouldn't stop us, wouldn't stop her.

It hadn't stopped me from trying but where had she been during the last three years? I am raging as I enter into the dining hall for dinner and I know my scowl and eyes are more deadly than they have ever been.

I can hear gasps from others as I walk along to my place at the leader table and take my place. I am just hoping anyone says shit to me right now so I can let off some of the rage and pent up aggression I am feeling.

"Eric?" Max looks to me from across the table. I know what the questioning tone is about and had anyone else asked I would be getting that fight. It just had to be him though, so I can't.

"Max" I respond casually with a smirk, as if he was just greeting me and I totally did not pick up on the spoken question.

Max quirks an eyebrow at me and smirks slightly. "Rather….big change going on there. Wouldn't you say?"

I shrug as I put tonight's dinner of meatloaf and other sides onto my plate. "I felt like changing things up a bit."

That was just a fucking lie. I had sat looking in the mirror for the better part of two hours today and before I knew it I was down to just the eyebrow dermal and my gauges. Then I had decided to go without the gel to get the curls out of my hair and that didn't work. So now my hair was shaved on the sides and longer on the top. I still am styling it so it won't curl but it looks much neater. All of this because when I looked in the mirror I could only see her fucking eyes looking back at me in disgust and disappointment.

I am prepared for laughter, disgust, sneering, disapproval or even a lack of what little respect I had gained; from those around me but Max in particular. When I manage to drag my eyes up to meet the elder man's though I see pleasure and a measured gain of respect.

Max nods once in my direction with a smile. "Suits you." He says simply then takes a drink and looks to be in thought. "You are still going to be helping to oversee the training starting as of tomorrow?"

He sounds doubtful that I will actually carry through with what I proposed last night. I don't blame him because I had all but laughed in his face when he had suggested it before. Now I can't help the slow smile of anticipation and pleasure that spreads across my face.

"I am. I look forward to seeing how effective the changes are with this new group." Not changes I proposed but ones I am having to enforce regardless. I am not worried about how Gia will do….not really.

Fuck it fine...I am worried. I am also going to use every opportunity to torment and torture her. Just like her memory and dreams of her have done me every night for the last three years.

My smirk gets wider when I see her bouncing in the dining hall. At first she doesn't see me. I know she knows I am here because we have always been able to detect or feel each other when we are close by. I had always likened it to our predator instincts that also recognized their mates. Because that is what she was and will be again. I don't care if I have to forcibly remove her from the fucking dorm one night...she will be in my bed again.

When she does see me, when I see her eyes roaming the room to lock onto my table, her eyes widen, nostrils flare and I can practically feel from here the desire flooding her.

Suddenly I am not so disgusted with myself for making those changes. Not with the result it has had with both her and Max, Harrison and Lex. My own desire as I take her in from head to toe and the little changes I know so well in her body when she is turned on, it courses through me. My nostrils flare as well as my eyes darken and I slowly lick my lips.

I smugly start to eat my dinner as Gia jerks her eyes from me with a scowl and refuses to look at me for the rest of the night.

Soon baby. You can act like you don't still want me but we both know the truth. It is only a matter of time. Starting tomorrow I plan on reminding you in anyways I can.

As if she heard or felt my mental challenge her eyes met mine one more time. Hers turned hard and cold, the look we both share. Her chin raised in a return challenge and she smirked wickedly back at me.

Game on, love.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Wow! Thanks all for the feedback! It has truly been awesome and is giving me such a boost that I can't even begin to describe it. I hope you enjoy the new chapter and the tidbits I lay down for you lovelies!**

 **Without further ado...**

 **Chapter 5**

 _Gia's POV_

"What do we want to do now?" Chris says looking to Will, Al and Tris but avoiding asking me. No one is really looking at me as we are eating cake after dinner.

My mood has soured considerably from how I was just before I entered into the dining hall. I can't be sure what is more upsetting. That I hurt him enough that he had gone and changed himself? That he cared enough still to even care what I thought? That I cared enough to hurt for him because I hurt him? That I was so damn turned on by him….even more than I had been last night….or that I just probably gave him the biggest erection by meeting his challenge of me.

It was all that and that I was just one big vibrating hormone with how much that challenge, him and memories of us together was making me feel right now.

Tris put her hand on my arm and had worried eyes as I looked up to her. "I was thinking of just getting some air." Then she leaned closer and smiled as she said this. "I was also hoping I could try that drop from the roof again."

Her eyes sparkled with excitement at that and I felt my mood lifting. Her look and my own desire for it as well eased some of the tension though not all. I nodded with a quiet laugh. "I can handle that."

I breathed a sigh of relief when Christina had decided to head to the Pit and explore. Will hedged on joining her and I think he was going to go to the training room to get in some bag work. Al was the only one that decided to join her in the end.

Tris and I took the way I remembered from the blueprints to the roof where we had jumped on that first day. When we were sitting finally I felt like I could breathe a little better. Now that there was all this space between Eric and I, as if just still being in the compound but no where near each other, was still not far enough.

We sat in the quiet enjoying the air and the night sky for a little while. That is interrupted by Tris when she starts to unload questions or thoughts that I guess had been building over the last day.

"Gia….have you ever been with someone before?" My head whips over to my friend and my eyes go wide. Not exactly the first question I expected her to launch into. Not that I hadn't expected her to broach the subject at some point considering the attraction I know both her and Four were feeling already.

I can't help but laugh a little at that and see she is blushing in the light of the moon. "Not the first question I thought you would have for me. But we can start there. Yes, I have been with men before."

I can tell that my answer shocks her a bit and she chews on her lip a little. "So you have...with more than one guy?"

Her tone isn't judgemental at all but curious. She has honest curiosity because she has never experienced the openness to be able to ask these kinds of questions. It was something I learned early on about Tris; shortly after I revealed myself to her when the fuck Peter had finally made a move to mess with her at school.

Tris loved to learn and had an open mind as long as she wasn't made to feel stupid, like a freak, condescended to or less than. If she got a hint of any of that she closed off to prevent herself from becoming hurt. I didn't mind her innocent or probing questions and if it had ever been anything I wasn't comfortable telling her I said as much. She understood and she returned that when I became too pushy….which let's face it I am just one pushy bitch regardless.

I smiled and shrugged. "I have been with a few men sexually. As far as truly enjoying myself or it being meaningful there has only been one that fell into that category."

She tilts her head and looks at me seriously. "If only one was enjoyable why would you have been with the others?"

I can't help the feeling of anger and pain that comes over me but I work to quickly push it aside. I can't tell her the real reason, that it wasn't my decision or choice. That it was thrust upon me and I had to be the good little girl, to not give up that I was working to take her down. She doesn't need to know how truly dark it can be or I can be. If I can save her from that at all I will. So I shrug and sigh, then when I have schooled my thoughts to not let the truth show, I look back to her.

"Bad choices, but they were learning experiences. I know that having had the real thing and then those...I know that I will never let something like that happen again. I won't settle for anything less than being with someone that means something to me ever again." I work very hard to keep the bitterness out of my voice that wants to break through.

If she detects the little bit that does she doesn't say anything. She just nods thoughtfully. "How did you know that you were attracted to the other person? Or if they were attracted or liked you?"

I smirk at her and laugh. "At first it was just how I felt. Like my stomach was in knots but my body was electrified. I couldn't really tell if he felt the same way or not because we were both so good about keeping emotions locked inside. One day I think we both just…..snapped...and couldn't take the tension anymore. I honestly to this day don't remember if I kissed him first or he kissed me first. I guess it didn't matter who did what first because we both knew we wanted each other from that point on."

Tris sighed with a smile and nodded. I could also tell what her next question was going to be and I braced myself for it. "What happened? I mean...did you leave him behind in Erudite?"

I shook my head and willed the pain to go away and keep my voice even. "No, he left before me. But….things don't always work out how you want them to and I lost him before that anyways."

Tris is special. Only a few lucky, truly lucky ones, will recognize this and see her and what she is. The moment I say this Tris' eyes fill slightly with the pain she knows I must be feeling or had felt. Not tears of weakness though. It takes a fucking strong person to be able to truly understand and empathize with another person. To be willing to feel their pain for even a second. Most people would snap from being bombarded with that but not Tris.

Her grey blue eyes, that turn silver in times like this, are holding mine so intently. She might not know that while her compassion is filling me with affection for her, it is also like a knife to my gut. Her eyes…..his eyes….everytime I see them I am torn apart and made whole again.

"Do you regret it?" She says finally after she has let me know with her look and a gentle hand to my arm that she understands.

I smile sadly and shake my head. "No. Even knowing how it would all end I wouldn't trade it at all. 'The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to just to love and be loved in return'. So maybe I hurt and was hurt. For those moments I burned, we burned together, and it was amazing. I felt free and alive."

Tris swallowed and nodded. I let her take these moments to process this as we both looked out over the city. I wondered how the others were doing tonight. How the plans were going and if my defection made the chaos that was needed to pull off a few crucial steps. I could only hope so and that they were able to get what I needed for the next step.

"Gia, I need to ask you something about the physical portion earlier." Tris says with more a firm and serious voice as she looks to me.

I nod for her to go ahead and turn to face her more fully. "Go ahead. You know you can talk to me about and ask me anything Tris."

She sighs and nods. "I had a thought and I was hoping I could talk it out with you. Like I did when we were talking about guns this morning. When I was working on the bags...I remembered you said that there would be no point in you holding back. Something occurred to me, that maybe you were also doing it on purpose. To maybe try and take notice from me?"

I can't help the smirk of pride and smile that light my face as I chuckle a little. "You are learning fast, Tris. Fuck I am proud of you. Yeah, I can admit that is part of the reason I am not holding back. For a couple of reasons on that end. Tell me why you think I might be though?"

Tris chewed her lip and thought and looked up at the stars. "The obvious reason is so that I can slip under the radar. So that when fights come they won't know what to expect other than what they assume."

She looks to me with a smile and I smile widely back. "Very good. Yes that is correct but only part of it. Can you guess the other part of it?" My tone turns serious and grave because this is almost the most important reason why I am doing this.

Tris' forehead scrunches up in thought. After a few minutes she sighs in defeat and shakes her head, looking at me apologetically.

I smile and pat her hand with a shake of my head. "Don't. It isn't an obvious reason, or at least it wouldn't be right now because nothing has happened yet. Tris, do you remember when I was trying to tell you to jump first? You figured out why I wanted you to go first right? To show them you aren't weak. We are both going to be walking a fine like here, Tris. With cuts...things might get ugly though I hope they don't. I am not built to hold back. It just isn't in my nature really. That alone is going to put me already in notice. You can't afford to hold back too much because you need to be noticed and rank well. This makes things dangerous for us. It will make us targets."

I can see it all connecting for Tris and her frown of anger starts forming. "So because I am a girl, a stiff and doing well, I will be targeted. Because I am the weaker of the top performers I will be the first to be targeted." She states this in anger and I nod.

"Unfortunately, yeah. They might not be physical attacks. They might be emotional or mental attacks. So my putting myself out there is me trying to draw that attention to myself. Not that I don't think you can handle it Tris but why should you have to? I just want you to focus on yourself and initiation. I want you to be able to find yourself here, to find your home, to find friends. I hate that this is going to be so…...cut throat...Tris. I hate that you and everyone else in our class doesn't get to experience this as coming together as a family and faction." I sigh wearily and think of all the work that needs to be done. Work I may or may not live to see started but I can make it possible at least.

"Tomorrow we are going to start fighting." It isn't a question from Tris but a statement. I can see and hear the worry in her voice.

"Do you want to go train more tonight? We can do it in the morning too." I offer her knowing that if I can get her to spar with me it might help her nerves tomorrow.

She looks over to me for a moment and then nods. "Let's go."

With a smile, a real smile of anticipation, she gets up as we make our way over to the hole. She winks at me and motions for me to go first this time. With a laugh I do just that. When I am off the net she plunges down with a laugh.

We are still laughing as we race to the dorms to change and head to the training room. As we do I realize that I may be helping Tris through this but she is helping and has been helping me all along too. Besides Eric and Will….Tris is the first real friend I have ever had...or allowed myself. For once and for a brief moment as our laughter carries us along with our feet, I feel like a teenage girl and not the assassin and soldier I was made to be.

For the first time in a while I feel free.

 _Four's POV_

I had been stunned when Tris had made her way into dinner. It was such simple changes but they still left me speechless. She was beautiful. It wasn't just the clothes, it was her smile as she almost bounced in with her friends to take her place and begin eating.

I was glad I had chosen to not sit at the table where the initiates were sitting tonight. It made it easier for me to watch her but also to keep my desire under check.

This afternoon when I had come up to her working the bags I had been hard pressed to keep things professional. There was something about her that is breaking through everything I had thought I would feel when it came to wanting to be with someone, even her. It wasn't just the physical though. There was something in her, a strength, that was calling to me. How was she capable of being so strong while all I could feel was like I was fighting with my own weakness constantly?

Zeke knows something is up with me as he keeps throwing me knowing looks now that we are in the Pit. I can't help my scowl as I look around for Tris and Gia. They had separated from the others but aren't anywhere I would think they would want to go.

I also can't help noticing that Eric seems to be scanning the Pit too. His looks to Gia tonight raised the hairs on the back of my arms. Not to mention the radical changes he made. It wasn't just a coincidence that he decided to do all of this the day after she shows up and shows obvious disgust at how he had looked. There is something there and I don't know if it is a good thing or not.

"He's hot. Did you know he could be so damn hot?" Mar sighs as she is looking over to Eric's direction.

Uri flashes a look of horror and hurt over to Mar who is oblivious to it.

"Hot or not he is still a dick." Lynn says with her a scowl as she scoffs at her friend.

"Yeah but….damn he is hot."

Uri huffs. "Yeah we get it Marlene. You think he is hot. Thanks by the way."

This breaks Mar out of her ogling and her eyes go to Uri in apology. I lose what she might be saying to try and make that up to her….maybe boyfriend? Zeke and Uri were strange. I could tell they were nothing but committed to Shauna and Marlene but they wouldn't commit. They didn't even have the excuses of having been conditioned to believe it was all taboo like I did.

My attention is pulled back to Eric who is scowling and stalking off after someone from leadership had approached him and they had a whispered conversation. Whatever he was told was not leaving him happy and he was in a hurry to get wherever he was going.

I don't know when I made the decision or why I did, but I was following him before I could think it over. One day this was going to get me in trouble, then again it might just save me or someone else.

I slip in and out of the shadows, following as quietly as I can. When I see he is going to certain corridors I take openings and shortcuts that I know that will allow me to keep up but still not be directly behind him.

Finally we make it to a very unused part of the compound. Eric is already speaking to someone that is hidden in the shadows. It is a woman's voice and one I know pretty well. Jeanine Matthews.

"Yes, Max did tell me about the changes you made. I must say it was a surprise. He was very pleased, regardless of what I think. I am assuming that is the reason for the changes and not the appearance of someone recently." Jeanine's cold and haughty tone rang through the darkness.

I couldn't see her but I could just imagine the eyes of ice narrowed in disdain and the sneer on her lips.

"I am just embracing more fully the role I have been given here. It was hinted that I needed to be more approachable and a man of Dauntless. I would say given Max's approval at dinner I have done that." Eric replied in his cold and emotionless voice.

Could she tell it was a lie? I couldn't by the tone of his voice and I had no way to see what his body posture was at the moment. The only reason I knew...well suspected...was because of what had happened with Gia at dinner.

There are long moments of silence before she speaks again. "This does not change our plans or our progress. You know your role. You can be replaced easily should you forget yourself. I am told that Four is doing exceptionally well with the initiates. Maybe that same effort he shows could be put towards what we have in store."

I can feel Eric's anger and disgust from my hiding place. " _Four_ has clearly shown he is unwilling and incapable of being anything other than a monitor jockey and a piss poor teacher. Like I have said before Jeanine. I know where my loyalties lie."

"See that you remember that. I can't say I am happy you went behind my back and involved yourself in all of the training but maybe this will be for the best." Her tone is dismissive as if she has said what she needed to say and he is of no more importance to her.

"Was there anything else Jeanine?" Eric grinds out, clearly upset.

I can't tell but she must have made a dismissive gesture because he turned as if to go but was stopped but a call from her. "Oh and Eric, if she can't be brought back to us...if she seems like she is going to interfere with things in any way….well you know what needs to be done. I expect you not to have any issues with this. After all, she did abandon you, remember."

It feels like the temperature has just dropped fifteen degrees where I am. I don't know whether that is in fear for Gia and what I know that means or from the coldness that I can practically rolling off the two in the dark corridor.

"I will make sure she sees reason and if not then I know exactly what needs to be done." Eric's tone is ice. I can almost see the eyes that I know he is capable of would mirror that tone.

He doesn't wait for a response from her and turns on his heel to stalk off. I press closer to the shadows to make sure I am still hidden from view and not detected. I can hear faint heel clicks away from me and I quickly move away on my own.

All I can think of is getting a visual on Tris and Gia at this point to make sure they are ok. I walk hurriedly down the corridors. I am pulled up short when in an unused room I hear loud crashing and screams of rage.

"Why did you have to fucking come here!" The voice, one that I wouldn't know to belongs to Eric if not for the distinctive tone, is unlike any I have heard him use before. More crashing and what sounds like maybe Eric punching things.

"Fuck you Jeanine! Fucking Bitch!" Is screamed as more items are thrown.

I am left in shock and not sure what to make of this at all. This isn't the Eric I have come to know. The uncaring, unfeeling and cruel Eric. Yes, he is capable of anger but it has always been a cold and calculated anger. The screams of anger being released right now are also ones of pain.

Whoever Jeanine was referring to, and I have a strong feeling it is Gia, is someone that Eric has some kind of feelings for.

The room has gone silent and I move away quickly before Eric can find me nearby. I need to think about this. I need to think about what I have heard, what I know from my previous digs for information and what I have been told by different sources.

I need to think on how and if I can do anything about this. This has made my decision that much harder but I think I knew the moment Tris dropped into the net what my answer to her would be. While Tris was here….I would be staying.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"There are ten of you and each of you will be paired with someone to fight today." says Four, stepping away from the board in the training room. He gives me a look. The space next to my name shows that I am paired with Myra.

My stomach twists as I see that and take the meaning of his look. I know he is trying to help me and I am actually happy that my first fight will be against someone of a similar frame. I also don't like that he assumes I couldn't handle more. Then again...I have been working to show that I am not as skilled.

Gia looks to me and nods with a smile. We had come up with a strategy last night and this morning. We went through all the possible people I could be put with and how I would handle each one. I am glad we did this so I know not to go as full out as I would have to against one of the guys or even Gia herself.

"This isn't good," says Christina, nudging me with her elbow. Her elbow prods one of my sore muscles. I have more sore muscles than not-sore muscles this morning after the workouts from yesterday and early morning. I wince slightly.

"Ow."

"Sorry." she mumbles. "But look. I'm up against the Tank."

Christina had sat with Gia and I at breakfast this morning. I was still unsure about Christina. At times she seemed like she wanted to be my friend and others she would make a comment or give me a look that made me wonder if she truly did. I am not even sure if she is even aware she is doing it.

This morning when I was changing she made a bigger deal out of the fact that I didn't need help or feel uncomfortable then I felt was necessary. It was almost like she was upset that I was able to and kept offering to help me.

Until Gia came into my life two years ago I had never really had friends before. I don't know if that is normal behavior but I want to try and make friends here so I let it roll off my shoulders.

"The Tank?" I find Christina's name of the board. Written next to it is 'Molly.'

"Yeah, Peter's slightly more feminine-looking minion," she says, nodding toward the cluster of people on the other side of the room. Molly is tall like Christina, but that's where the similarities end. She has broad shoulders, bronze skin, and a bulbous nose.

"Those three…" Christina points at Peter, Drew and Molly in turn "have been inseparable since they crawled out of the womb, practically. I hate them." Her voice is laced with bitterness and anger.

Will and Al are up to fight first. They stand across from each other in the arena. They put their hands up by their faces to protect themselves, as Four taught us, and shuffle in a circle around each other. Al is half a foot taller than Will and twice as broad. As I stare at him I realize that even his facial features are big. Big nose, big lips, big eyes. This fight won't last long.

I can tell even Gia senses this. She is tensed, arms crossed over her chest and eyes darting between the two. I know she is worried about Will but she had warned him that he gave it his all or he might as well go home now.

She had warned us all this morning at breakfast. Will, Al and I had nodded in understanding while Chris had seemed deep in thought or just didn't care.

My eyes move over to Peter and his friends. Drew is shorter than both Peter and Molly but he is built like a boulder and his shoulders are always hunched. His hair is orange-red, the color of an old carrot.

"What's wrong with them?" I ask as I look back to Christina.

"Peter is pure evil. When we were kids, he would pick fights with people from other factions and then when an adult came to break it up, he'd cry and make up some story about how the other kid started it. And of course, they believed him, because we were Candor and we couldn't lie. Ha ha ha." Christina wrinkles her nose and adds. "Drew is just his sidekick. I doubt he has an independent thought in his brain. And Molly...she's the kind of person who fries ants with a magnifying glass just to watch them flail around."

In the arena, Al punches Will hard in the jaw. I wince. Across the room, Eric smirks at Al and shifts as he crosses his arms over his chest. Then his eyes graze over us like they have been all morning so far. As always it is centered on Gia.

He had come in a foul mood and his cold glares towards Gia had sent shudders up my spine.

Will stumbles to the side, one hand pressed to his face and blocks Al's next punch with his free hand. Judging by his grimace, blocking the punch is as painful as a blow would have been. Al is slow but powerful.

Peter, Drew and Molly cast furtive looks in our direction and then pull their heads together, whispering.

"I think they knew we're talking about them." I say.

"So? They already know I hate them."

"They do? How?"

Christina fakes a smile at them and waves. I look down, my cheeks warm. This is wrong. Her smile is wrong paired with all her words of being honest. Gossiping...it was one of those things I wasn't allowed to do. Now it isn't so much that I wasn't allowed to do it that is making feel uncomfortable, it is I just don't like it.

I do like knowing what kind of people are around me though. So maybe I should see it like that and not gossiping. He picked fights with others, it doesn't make him evil. A dick but not evil. This is coming from one of the people he tried to torment too. Drew seemed to not have much brain and followed orders. Molly….now I can see her as being evil.

Christina breaks me from my thoughts by answering and I can see Gia watching us closely but also watching the match.

Will had hooked a foot around one of Al's legs and yanks back, knocking Al to the ground. Al scrambles to his feet.

"Because I've told them," she says, through the gritted teeth of her smile. Her teeth are straight on top and crooked on the bottom. She looks to me. "We try to be pretty honest about our feelings in Candor. Plenty of people have told me that they don't like me. And plenty of people haven't. Who cares?"

I am fairly stunned to be honest. Who cares? Why doesn't she? She doesn't care how cruel that is on so many levels. Gia huffs and scoffs next to me then turns to Christina. Her look, for once, isn't a glare or hard. If anything it is full of pity and frustration.

"Can I ask you something Christina? Can you hold on to that strong Candor streak you seem so damn reluctant to let go of and answer me honestly? Keep in mind Candor's weren't the only one that are taught to spot lies." Her voice is calm and curious as she looks to Christina.

That alone has Christina curious herself and I admit I am to. This is a new demeanor for Gia when it comes to her.

"Go ahead."

"Do you really not care like you are saying? Because I can tell you do. You should to, Christina, because until you start caring if you hurt someone else's feelings, until you start caring about anyone other than yourself, you won't have friends here. Do you want friends or do you want to be just as alone as you were in Candor?"

Christina pales and she bristles slightly but I can see that everything Gia said rings true in her. It should because it is true. I may not have had the most experience with friends but even for all of Gia's faults I know she cares about me and is trying to think of my feelings or if I am ok.

I haven't seen that really from Christina. I know she wants to be friends but can she be? Can I be friends with someone that can so easily gossip about another person or thinks it is truly acceptable to say whatever is on her mind just because she thinks it is better that way. No matter the harm it does?

Gia sighs and watches the fight again. "Christina, I know you think at this moment I am trying to be a bitch. I don't deny I am one but that isn't what this is about. We are supposed to become each other's new family. That can't happen for you or any of us until we realize that all this…." she waves to the fights "it is designed to make us stronger but not before breaking us down. We will need each other for that. You will need friends but you aren't going to be making any with the attitude you have currently."

Christina gets quiet and looks to the ground. "I thought I had friends." She remarks quietly.

Gia shrugs still watching the fight. "You might have the beginnings of friendship. It can't all be one sided though. Just give it some thought."

Christina looks to me and I give her a small smile before I turn back to focus on the fight as well. We both have a lot to think about.

Will and Al face each other for a few more seconds, more hesitant than they were. On Will's part I can tell it is him appraising the best way to get the advantage here. He flicks his pale hair from his eyes.

They cast eyes to Four like they are waiting for him to call the fight off or him to give them pointers. He just stands with his arms folded giving no response or sign that he is going to either.

Gia sighs impatiently and starts to bounce on the balls of her feet. I can hear muttering under her breath about just going for it. I think she is scolding Will for not going all out like she had warned him he needed to.

A few feet away from Four, Eric had been watching the fight but also Gia. When he saw her start to bounce he smirked, checked his watch and rolled his eyes.

After a few more seconds of circling he shouts. "Do you think this is a leisure activity? Should we break for nap-time? Fight each other!"

Four remains silent and I wonder why he wasn't the one to try and encourage his two initiates.

"But…." Al straightens and I hear Gia groan lowly as Al lets his hands down to speak, stopping the fight basically. "Is it scored or something? When does the fight end?"

My mind goes back to yesterday when Four was telling us about this stage. That it is to prepare us to be able to respond to threats. To make our bodies ready for that. It isn't ideal to have to fight our friends but I would rather that than to face an enemy to learn from.

"It ends when one of you is unable to continue." Eric replies.

Four tilts his head and his eyes narrow. "According to Dauntless rules," Four says, "one of you could also concede."

Eric narrows his eyes back at Four as he pauses for a second. "According to the _old_ rules," he says with force. "In the new rules, no one concedes."

"A brave man acknowledges the strength of others," Four replies and I do not know him well enough but his tone is almost, testing or goading.

"A brave man never surrenders."

Four and Eric stare at each other for a few seconds. I feel like I am looking at two different kinds of Dauntless - the honorable kind and the ruthless kind. I don't understand why Four would purposely be challenging Eric in front of us all. Especially when he is an instructor so should have known the rules and that they had changed to begin with. But even I know that in this room, it's Eric, the youngest leader of Dauntless, who has the authority.

Gia's jaw and fists are clenched and I realize that it isn't Eric her glare is directed to but Four. Gia has shown nothing but respect for Four so far, but I see him losing some of it from her at this moment. It tells me I was right. Four was challenging a leader of his faction for but what reason? It wasn't helping us in fact it was rather confusing. Who was in the right? The trainer or the leader?

Beads of sweat dot Al's forehead; he wipes them with the back of his hand.

"This is ridiculous," Al says, shaking his head. "What's the point of beating him up? We're in the same faction!"

I roll my eyes and match Gia's sigh.

"Oh, you think it's going to be that easy?" Will asks grinning but his jaw is set. "Go on. Try to hit me, slowpoke."

Will puts his hands up again and I can see the determination I saw in the morning excersises back in his eyes. I know that Will might not win. One hard shot to the head and Al will knock him out cold. That depends on if Al can actually hit Will though.

Al tries a punch and Will ducks, the back of his neck shining with sweat. He dodged another punch, slipping around Al and kicking him hard in the back. Al lurches forward and turns.

When I was younger I read a book about grizzly bears. There was a picture of one standing on its hind legs with its paws outstretched, roaring. That is how Al looks now. He charges at Will, grabbing his arm so he can't slip away, and punches him hard in the jaw.

I watch the light leave Will's eyes, which are pale green, like celery. They roll back into his head and all the tension alls from his body. He slips from Al's grasp, dead weight, and crumples to the floor. Cold rushes down my back and fills my chest.

"He'll be ok, Tris. Remember what I said. This is what we are now and it won't kill us. I would _never_ let you do anything that will hurt yourself, only make you stronger." Gia whispers this lowly in my ear as she sees my body trembling a little.

I had told her I am not worried about my pain. I am worried about causing others pain though after she had told me that she would never let anyone hurt me. I believe her but I also know that she isn't meaning during our fighting. She means if they mean to take it beyond what our training is about or outside of it.

I nod as we both look to where Al and Will are. Al's eyes had widened and he crouched next to Will, tapping his cheek with one hand. The room is silent as we wait for Will to respond. For a few seconds, he doesn't, just lies on the ground with an arm bent beneath him. Then he blinks, clearly dazed.

"Get him up." Eric orders. He looks over the two and his eyes narrow at Will. At first I think it is a disgusting look, as if he is drinking in the sight like it is a meal and he hasn't eaten in weeks. That isn't quite what it is though. It is calculating and appraising again as his eyes run over Will when he starts to move. He is accesing his condition? When his eyes move over to Al his lip turns up cruelly.

I don't know that I blame him for his disgust with Al right now. Al showed promise in one moment and then failed in the next with his obvious horror at his own actions. In that instant I know that as much as Al might want to make it here, he won't. Not unless he becomes as strong in character as he is in body.

Four turns to the chalkboard and circles Al's name. Victory.

"Next up- Molly and Christina!" Shouts Eric. Al pulls Will's arm across his shoulders and drags him out of the arena.

Christina cracks her knuckles. I would wish her luck but I don't know what good that would do. Christina isn't weak but she's much narrower than Molly. Hopefully her height will help her.

"Full out Christina." Gia hisses in warning just as she passes her.

Across the room, Four supports Will from the waist and leads him out. Al stands for a moment by the door, watching them go.

Four leaving makes me nervous. Leaving us with Eric is like hiring a babysitter who spends his time sharpening knives. My lips quirk at my own thought because then again, Gia isn't that much better.

Leaving Eric here without Four around and the looks Eric is sending her is what makes me even more nervous.

 _Gia's POV_

I am nervous about the match. As well as all the other people I have come to know. I may not care for Christina, she just rubs me the wrong way, but I don't think she is a bad person and could be a good Dauntless. She could also be a good friend. It all comes down to her wanting to rise above how she was raised to do so.

Candor's more than any of the other factions have the hardest time in making friends even within their own faction. Never mind when they transfer into another faction.

We can't help how we are raised. We can't help how we are started on the path in life. We can help how we choose to continue that path. Hopefully what I said will help her. Hopefully it will help Tris in realizing that even if Christina doesn't change, she doesn't have to keep being someone's friend just because she feels she needs to be. Not even with me.

Will might have lost but he gave it his all. That will help him in points. As long as Tris and Christina do the same they will be alright. If either of them hesitate as Al did, if they question things as Al did, they will be penalized greatly.

Christina tucks her hair behind her ears. It is chin-length, black, and pinned back with silver clips. She cracks another knuckle. She looks nervous and I understand that would be the case after watching Will collapse. She also should note that Will was able to get up again. She won't be able to see that though I can already tell.

I can sense Tris' debate. Wondering what the point of this is. We talked last night when I had her sparring against me. I know she is worried that this will change her. I was honest with her and told her it would. How she let it change her though was up to her. She doesn't have to be cruel to be strong. She doesn't have to be brutal to be brave.

I think she understands. I hope she does because these next few weeks….it is only going to get worse. The first day is always the roughest too.

We both are tense when Christina kicks out at Molly to her side. Molly gasps and grits her teeth like she's about to growl through them. A lock of stringy black hair falls across her face, but she doesn't brush it away.

Al moves to stand next to us. I barely glance at him and work to not do so. I had hoped for him he would be able to do as he said he was going to do but I don't know if that was going to happen now. The moment things had gotten rough he had balked. That wasn't someone that could be allowed in Dauntless. That way lay possible death for more than just himself.

Tris doesn't move to congratulate him either. She is to focused on the fight and Al wouldn't have appreciated it anyways, judging by his sulky expression.

Molly smirks at Christina and without warning she dives, hands outstretched at Christina's midsection. She hits her hard, knocking her down, and pins her to the ground. Christina thrashes but Molly is heavy and doesn't budge.

She punches and Christina moves her head out of the way but Molly just punches again and again. Finally her fist hits Christina's jaw, her nose, her mouth.

Tris, in reflex I think, grabs Al's arm. Blood starts to run down the side of Christina's face and splatters on the ground next to her cheek. Christina screams and drags one of her arms free. She punches Molly in the ear, knocking her off-balance and wriggles free. She comes to her knees, holding her face with one hand. The blood streaming from her nose is thick and dark. It covers her fingers in seconds. She screams again and crawls away from Molly. I know she is sobbing in those screams and I am silently willing her to stand. To show she can and will fight and to try.

Molly kicks Christina's side, sending her sprawling on her back. Al pulls Tris to his side while Tris' jaw clenches. Christina clutches her rib cage and the look on her face alerts me.

"Don't do it Christina." I get out before she does what I was hoping she wouldn't.

"Stop!" She wails as Molly pulls her foot back to kick again. Christina holds out a hand. "Stop! I'm…" she coughs. "I'm done."

Molly smiles and Tris looks worriedly to me. I can only close my eyes and shake my head. Al sighs in relief and I want to yell at him.

Eric locks eyes with me as he makes his way toward the center of the arena. I already know what is coming and I know he is also daring me to stop it if I think it is the wrong thing to do. I know he also sees I won't because it isn't.

He throws a brief smirk to me before he slowly makes his way to stand over Christina with his arms folded. "I'm sorry, what did you say? You're done?" He says quietly.

I feel shivers run up my spine at that and curse myself. Telling myself that this is not the time or place for that. Never is the fucking time or place for it, ever again!

Christina pushes herself to her knees. When she takes her hand from the ground, it leaves a red handprint behind. She pinches her nose to stop the bleeding and nods.

"Get up." He says. I can tell Tris senses the danger here. Everyone should. He radiates it right now.

That voice, the cold and calm one, is used for that very purpose. To inspire fear, put someone off their game, bring home a point. I should know since we both use it and were taught it by the masters of it.

He grabs Christina's arm, yanks her to her feet and drags her out the door.

"Follow me," he says to the rest of us. And we do of course.

Tris is walking next to me and I sigh. "Whatever happens, Tris. Don't interfere. Please, remember my promise. I will extend that to her too."

I get that all out as we approach the Chasm and I have an idea of what he is going to do.

We stand near the railing. The Pit is almost empty; it is the middle of the afternoon. I can see several people looking around and I know they are wondering if anyone is going to stop what they know is about to happen or feel is about to happen.

Even before the changes they wouldn't have. Not if they knew why it was being done. This is all within the rules anyways.

Eric shoves Christina against the railing.

"Climb over it." He says quietly, still.

"What?" She says it like she expects him to relent but her wide yes and ashen face suggest that she knows deep down otherwise. Eric will not back down. There aren't many he has before from.

"Climb over the railing." Eric says again but this time pronouncing each word slowly. "If you can hang over the chasm for five minutes, I will forget your cowardice. If you can't, I will not allow you to continue initiation."

Tris grips my hand with a clenched jaw and I see eyes widen all around me. I can understand their surprise or even confusion. They got mixed messages before. I don't know why Four challenged Eric about something so fucking vital that I know he had to know wouldn't be helping us.

He did it almost as if trying to provoke Eric but for what purpose I don't know. All it ended up doing was sending the message to us all that even our leaders can't make up their mind on what we should do. Four needed to encourage us to push through. He needed to back up his leader even when he might not agree with it. He needed to not give us the impression that this...what Christina did, was ok. Because it isn't and now we are here.

The railing is narrow and made of metal. The spray from the river coats it, making it slippery and cold. I know everyone is wondering if she will be strong enough to hold on. I know she can but I don't know that she does herself.

Either she decided to be factionless or she takes the risk.

"Fine." She says finally, her voice shaking.

She is tall enough to swing her leg over the railing. Her foot shakes. She puts her toe on the ledge as she lifts her other leg over. Facing us, she wipes her hands on her pants and holds onto the railing so hard her knuckles turn white. Then she takes one foot off the ledge. And then the other. I see her face between the bars of the barrier, determined, her lips pressed together.

On the other side of Tris, Al sets his watch.

For the first minute and a half, Christna is fine. Her hands stay firm around the railing and her arms don't shake. Then the river hits the wall and white water sprays against Christina's back. Her face strikes the barrier and she cries out. Her hands slip so she's just holding on by her fingertips. She tries to get a better grip but now her hands are wet.

Tris is squeezing my hand hard and my eyes move to Eric's. Eric who isn't watching Christina but me. Me and Tris, and I know I need to get his attention off of Tris. I also know that I need to help Christina. I take a breath, return the squeeze to Tris' hand and look to her.

I try to let her know with my eyes that I am sorry beforehand for the distress it will cause her, what I am about to do. It needs to be done though and for that I won't apologize.

I step forward, my face hard as Christina's face is crumpled and lets out a sob that is louder than the river. Another wave hits the wall and the spray coats her body. One of the droplets hits my cheek as I kneel beside her and get eye level with her.

Her hands slip again, and this time, one of them falls from the railing, so she's hanging by four fingertips.

"Grab back hold Christina. You can do it." I smirk wickedly at her. "Or don't and let go. The Chasm has to be a much better fate than being factionless. Come on….let go. Give up. That is what you do best isn't?"

My voice is full of disdain and a sneer. Her face flashes with anger at me and she grits her teeth. "Shut the fuck up, Gia."

She gets out after her sobs cease. Well...that is one battle down.

"Or what? Are you going to make me shut up, Candy? You can't even take a few hits. Not like you are in a position to be telling me to do anything there, Christina. Should I play a little...this piggy went to market?"

I act like I am going to reach forward and inwardly smile when she growls and suddenly she swings her arm. Whether she is grabbing for the railing or trying to swing at me I don't know. I know she does end up grabbing the railing though. "Shut up Gia!" She gets out when she finally gets a hold of the railing again.

I can see by my watch that she has only one minute to go. I have her focused on me. I have her ignoring the chasm and the water that is pounding against the rocks and both of us in turn. I have her ignoring the shaking in her arms. One minute is a long time to hold onto anger in the face of death.

"Don't like the truth, Candor? What was that back there in the arena? You showing just how Dauntless you are? You gave up so easily." I say this in a taunting silky voice. "Just think how easy it would be to give up now? You wouldn't have to worry about being in pain anymore. No more worrying about if you measure up to everyone else here and failing badly. All you have to do….is give up." I finish in a soft and voice full of persuasion but also derision.

Her grip tightens on the rail instead of loosening. She growls in anger as her eyes bore into mine.

"Five minutes are up!" Al spits out.

I can see from the corner of my eyes Eric smirk at me then check his watch. Taking his time, tilting his wrist.

"Fine." Eric says finally. "You can come up, Christina."

Al walks toward the railing and Eric's eyes snap to him. "No." He barks out. "She has to do it on her own."

"No she doesn't." Al growls. "She did what you said. She's not a coward. She did what you said."

I am smirking wickedly at Christina….trying to goad her to try for more. "It's fine." She grits out and starts to pull herself over. When she gets to a certain point I reach out and pull her up.

When I help to pull her over I pull her close to my ear. "Remember this Christina. Remember you are stronger than you think. Don't ever fucking give up. Dauntless don't give up."

I can tell she understands but my presence and words aren't appreciated so I step back quickly and let Al and Tris come forward.

Tris is looking at me in concern but I can't met her eyes right now. I am finding I don't want to look and see the disgust she might be feeling for my actions. I still would have done them. They needed to happen. I wouldn't have let Christina fall and neither would have Eric. But he would have made her factionless. As it is I helped to save her some points, I think.

I back away, walking quickly towards the training room. I know Eric is following closely but I can't face his smug looks right now. My feet carry me quickly to the training room to wait for the next matches, mine included. I am looking forward to it so I can get some of my physical energy out. It happens to be against Drew so that is a plus.

I take the next few seconds to gather myself in the quiet of the training room, hoping I didn't just lose the first friendship that I have allowed to mean something to me in three years.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thank you again for everyone's responses to this fanfic. Thank you DYK for the inspiration or it...I really was inspired by reading DU so that credit needs to go to you! paula'08 thank you as well for your encouragement and the help with the book parts to make it easier for me.**

 **I wanted to let everyone know that I am going to try and update a chapter a day. This week I had to take off from my gym and training time so I could let my body do it's thing and recover from one of my pain flares. I am going to hit it pretty hard again starting tomorrow so I expect some nights where I won't be much use for anything. That being said I am trying to get it all put in ahead of time. I hope you enjoy this chapter and the direction I am going!**

 **Chapter 6**

 _Four's POV_

I am not sure what happened while I was gone taking Will to the infirmary. Whatever it is has everyone on edge. At first I thought it was just with Eric but then I see that there are looks being cast to Gia too. Eric is looking at her like she gave him the biggest present in the world and Tris is looking worried. Not like Al who is looking at her in horror and anger all in one.

"What the fuck just happened?" I blurt out to Eric before I have a chance to stop myself.

Eric only turns and smirks at me. "Lessons were taught, things that needed to be learned. Shame their instructor couldn't bother himself to get the message through the first time."

He says this all and shrugs as he moves forward and looks at the board for the next match up. "Next fight. Drew and Gia." He calls out loudly.

Gia throws a glare in his direction before stepping into the ring. I am already tense. I could tell from watching her that Gia is leagues above what the other initiates are. Even more than Edward who I had thought was going to be the one to beat before I saw Gia in action.

She is deceptive in how she holds herself and dresses. Something else strikes me when she walks into the ring and her whole demeanor changes. She walks like a panther on the prowl and stands coiled like a viper ready to strike. It is so similar to Eric, the way he was and is, that I feel sick to my stomach at the slaughter I know I am about to watch.

Drew is trying to be overconfident as he walks into the ring and taunts her. The taunts are weak at best and sound like a pour imitation of the tone his ringleader Molly spouts. I would have said Peter was the ringleader at first but after watching them I have found Peter likes to talk but the real person behind it all is the girl of the group.

Tris moves closer to the ring and is watching closely. I don't know why I do it but I move closer to her to. I feel like I need to lend her support of some kind. Even when I am feeling unsure and uneasy about this myself.

I expected Gia to decimate Drew. To do it fast and maybe even dirty but after three minutes the fight is still going on. She is holding back I just don't know why. She darts in and hits him hard in places before moving back out. He gives loud screams of pain and charges her but she is just too fast to catch.

It finally hits me what she is doing and I feel that sickness rise again. She is playing with him. Maybe I can understand why. I can almost get why she might be doing it. Trying to draw all their ire to her. For them to focus on her and not the others. She is already ranked first so far and if she continues the way she has been she will stay that way. She is already a target but she is making it worse.

"Either get this shit done and stop playing with him or get the hell out of my arena!" Eric bellows with look of rage right at Gia.

Drew stops and whirls to scowl at Eric but he doesn't notice. Gia turns calmly and stares Eric down. The whole room has gone silent. So silent all you can hear is breathing.

She doesn't respond but turns away from him and back to Drew. She takes her ready stance and winks to Drew who blanches and takes his own. I let out a groan when they start up again because she is still playing the same game with Drew.

Now it isn't for Drew though because her eyes move to Eric taunting him to do something about it. When he does I know it is nothing but bad news.

"Out of the ring." Eric says just as he jumps in, grabs Drew's collar and tosses him out. "I warned you to stop playing around. Now you get to face me or you get out of here completely."

The tone his voice takes is that of the cold menace I heard when he told Jeanine he knew what he would have to do.

Tris gasps beside me. "He can't….she can't…" She doesn't finish as Eric rips off his jacket and tosses it aside before his boots follow.

If Gia has fear she doesn't show it. If she is pleased she doesn't show it either. In fact the minute his clothing hits the floor neither show a sign of any kind of emotion.

I am spurred to finally say something. "Eric…." I start to call out.

"Save it _Four_. You won't win this argument." Eric sneers out, never facing me or turning his head towards me. "All out Gia or you are out."

Gia nods and a smirk ghosts her lips. "As my _Leader_ I have to follow your orders. All out Eric." The word leader was said with contempt and filled with other meaning.

I close my eyes and prepare to watching nothing good come out of this situation. They circle each other, taking in each other's moves and stance. I am surprised Eric isn't the first to make a move. He is usually an aggressive and offensive fighter. He dominates quickly and brutally; his matches are over before the opponent registers they were even started. The only exception to that is when Eric is in the mood to play and then he draws out the torture and bloodletting as long as possible.

It comes suddenly when Gia moves to deliver a series of kicks from the side or to the side. Eric easily blocks them with his elbow and then moves to return those same kicks to the side.

Gia blocks them in the same manner but then switches her return kicks to go higher this time. Those are batted away just as easily. She is forcing Eric back a few steps with every kick but when she goes in for another kick, instead of blocking with his hand Eric goes into a spin kick.

There is a sickening sound of his foot meeting her face and she goes to the ground. I expect with the force behind it, to look and find Gia already unconscious and bloody, but she isn't. She smirks up at Eric and wipes the blood from her mouth before leaping up again.

Eric has a smug look on his face just before I see them both flash something in their eyes. I don't know what it is but I can tell they had only been playing with each other before. Now they were getting serious.

The way their fists start flying at each other, they way they block, spin and counter attack; reminds me of something out of a martial arts movie that I had seen with Zeke and his brother at the theatre here.

It was one of many in a movie with Bruce Lee but the one that this fight reminds me of so much was the one with Chuck Norris.

Ten minutes in and Gia isn't the only one that is bloody and bruised. They are losing their calm, if they ever truly were calm when they entered into the fight. They switch styles and power attacks so quickly it is almost dizzying.

They don't see us. I can tell that right away. They also aren't going to stop I realize. I realize this just about the time they start launching into kicks so fast and lethal I am sure I am going to see Gia dead before me.

I can't count the amount of crunching bones I have heard. How many times I have seen Gia get a hit to the head with Eric's foot or fist. How many times I have seen Gia return that with a flurry of hits from her fist and feet. They are both panting and spitting blood and I am bouncing now hoping one of them drops unconscious. They have to be close, Gia at least is from the way she is swaying as she gets up from the last time Eric puts her down.

"Stay down Gia." Eric growls out as he blinks the blood and sweat from his eyes.

"A brave man never surrenders, Eric. Isn't that what you wanted to teach them." Gia purrs out to him menacingly.

Eric lets out a hiss of rage and then lunges for her again. He stumbles slightly and Gia takes the opening to launch into a spin kick, connecting with his head and making him drop. It is the last thing she does as she falls to the floor and groans before going under herself.

What the fuck do I do? "Al and Drew. Get Eric to the infirmary. Everyone stay here and take a break while I get Gia sorted."

Al and Drew are both white and afraid to approach or touch the Leader. I don't blame them. Edward jumps to help me with Gia and I wave him off as I notice Tris by my side.

"Will she be ok?" She asks me with tears in her eyes as I lift Gia up. Blood is pouring from her nose and I have to position her so she doesn't swallow or choke on any.

"We'll get her fixed up. Stay here and warm up. I am sorry but you are going to have to go next." My forehead furrows in my frown as I try to soften my tone for her.

Tris' eyes flash anger then determination. "She wouldn't want me to lose focus so I won't." Her teeth are gritted and her jaw is clenched. There is a fire that is raging there; it is beautiful and scary.

I nod to her briefly then move behind my two initiates who are struggling to haul Eric along with them to the infirmary. I have no time to process what I just saw or what the fallout is going to be.

Something happened that spurred Gia on to act so rashly and I need to know what it was. Whatever it was had Eric pleased with her and she looked to be pissed with herself and the situation. I just hoped that when tomorrow came Gia was still around.

 _Eric's POV_

I woke up in the infirmary in a private room. It took me a few moments to blink my eyes clear, the one that I could open anyways. I felt the pain meds they must have started to give me coursing through my body. They didn't do much of shit for me. The regular meds and serums never did. That wasn't something I announced though. I kept my own private stock for if and when I did get hurt.

I must be bad if they had to put me in a room for the leaders and senior members. I must be bad if I was hooked up to all of this shit still. Remembering what put me in here has me groaning as I move to sit up. If I am bad how is Gia?

Gia. Fuck why did I let myself get so angry that I forgot myself? I hated that she was feeling upset with herself for trying to reinforce the lesson these little punks needed to learn. I shouldn't have let her do it to begin with. I knew the moment she moved forward she was going to try and help in her own way.

The stupid girl didn't deserve Gia's help. I also knew that part of the reason I was having to even teach this lesson came down to the new asinine rules as well as Four and I. We shouldn't have disagreed like that. Fucking Four shouldn't have contradicted me like that. Why he chose then of all times to try and provoke me to anger I don't know. In the end the message got twisted and I was working to contain my anger so didn't bother to try and make it more clear.

There was a time and a place for giving it your all and a time to surrender. To regroup and rethink things, it wasn't giving up it was playing it smart.

These initiates couldn't and wouldn't learn that lesson until later. Right now we had to make sure they had that Dauntless fire and spirit. To know they are stronger than they think. At least that is part of why the rules were changed. The other part wasn't something I could or would agree with but I had my orders and a duty to fulfill.

So I sat there stewing in that knowledge. Hating life and feeling my anger building by the second. Her coming to Dauntless just heightened my awareness of how fucked everything was right now. Gia wasn't going to see reason. I was going to have to end up doing something to her and it was killing me. Making me livid until I finally snapped. Watching her in the ring holding back, it just snapped something inside of me that I had been holding back from the moment I saw her.

All that pain, anger and longing snapped inside of me and all I could think was I needed to hurt her as much as I was hurting.

I needed to find out how bad she was. How bad I had hurt her. I ripped the iv and monitors from my arms, setting off alarms and a nurse racing in.

"Leader Coulter, you need to get back in bed, you…" she starts to try and push me back onto the bed as I get up, wincing and growling at the pain ripping through me.

"If you want to remain breathing I suggest you get your hands off of me. I need to check on the status of the initiate….." I barely get this out as a wave of pain hits me and not all from my injuries. The nurse's face turned white and she flinched at the mention of Gia.

"Where is she?" My voice goes soft and deadly. I will not be denied answers or seeing her.

The nurse must sense this and she bustles away in front of me to lead the way. I mask the anguish I feel rip through me at the sight of Gia in the bed. I forget how small she really is. She is always larger than life in personality and aura. She always has been. It makes her seem so indestructible that seeing her like this is killing me.

"Status." I demand without bothering to look at the nurse.

"Severe concussions, fractured ribs, dislocated shoulder….there has been some bleeding…."

My growl interrupts her status report. "Why hasn't she been given any of the healing serum?"

The nurse gulps and shakes her head. "She has….several doses but….it isn't working as well as it should. On either of you but you were only slightly less injured than her."

My mind is working furiously as I look at my watch. It is risky but I don't care. "I want her discharge papers in my hand in ten minutes along with two vials of the grade a pain meds." My eyes move to the nurse who isn't moving a muscle. "Now!" I bark at her and she jumps into motion.

Once she is gone I go back to get into my clothes and out of the gown I was in. I make it back to the room, gritting my teeth through the pain and then start working on getting Gia unhooked from the monitors and iv.

By the time the nurse is back with what I asked for I have Gia ready and somewhat dressed. I didn't bother with her boots or any underthings. I just slipped her shirt over the gown and then slipped her pants up her legs enough to cover her properly. There was a bag with the rest of her things already so I just shoved the papers and meds in that and then moved back to Gia.

"She was discharged and sent back to the dorms. That is what you will report and what you will say if asked. Am I understood?" I turn my voice and eyes full ice and menace on the nurse.

She nods, still white but she is also looking worried and furious too. "She shouldn't be moved, Leader Coulter. It could make things worse."

I grunt as an answer and in pain as I lift her in my arms. She barely weighs anything but any weight hurts me at the moment. Damn, she fucked me up good. Not even my fight with Four left me in this much pain.

I don't say anything else as I move out of the infirmary. I take as many of the shortcuts and corridors that I know don't have great camera points as possible. I push through the pain and the shortness of breath I have by the time I reach my apartment.

Gia's eyes are starting to flutter letting me know she will be coming out of the meds that she was given and quickly. I need to get her settled and into my stash before she does or I will have a fight on my hands...again.

She won't like where I have her or what I am about to do but I don't fucking care. I don't care that Jeanine would probably order me to take her to Erudite and then just keep her ass there. It isn't happening. I have to be able to get Gia to see sense again. I need her beside me again. I have to start somewhere and this is as good of a chance as I am going to get.

I get her laid down on my bed and move as quickly as my own injuries allow me to. I wanted to shower and maybe bathe Gia to get all the fucking blood and other shit I know we have coating us after how we went at each other. They cleaned us up as much as possible I am sure but it wouldn't be as good as how I could get us clean.

With a sigh I do the next best thing and get a small bowl and wash cloth along with the meds from my stash. Her moans of pain as I have to move her around are like knives tearing me apart. I try to work quickly to save her more pain. By the time I have her cleaned as best as I can and one of my shirts slipped over her, her eyes are drifting open.

She registers where she is and who she is with about the time I have pushed the plunger on the needle to give her the pain meds that I know will work on her.

"Eric...no..stop please." She mumbles out groggily in a voice that is raw from pain. I have to hold her in place as she feebly tries to get up.

"Stay still Gia, please. I have to give you the harder shit and my healing serums...the others weren't working." My voice is soft but not from my cold anger. It is soft from the pain I am feeling from my own injuries but also knowing I did this to her.

Gia sighs and lets her body relax. "Why bother Eric. She's just going to order you to kill me."

Those are the last words Gia says before she goes under from the meds. My face contorts in pain and I let my head drop to her shoulder as a sob wracks me. I wish she weren't fucking right. I wish I didn't know that it was going to come down to that. Wishes were just whispers in the wind and nothing would stop what I knew was coming.

Not unless I made it stop. Now that she was here...I couldn't lose her again. I don't know what made her abandon us and what we had. I don't know what made her cut herself off from me but I don't know that I cared anymore. I had to make her see she belonged beside me again.

I couldn't do that unless I took care of myself too. I gritted my teeth with every movement I made to get undresses and then gave myself the healing serums and the two vials of pain meds I had the nurse give me. I was saving the others for Gia and I could put up with this shit for now.

She was out and wouldn't be able to fight it, so I pulled her into my arms as I let the exhaustion and meds take over me to pull me under. This wasn't exactly how I had envisioned her being in my bed again with me but fuck if I wouldn't take it.

I might just need to steal her away from the dorms every night after tonight with how good she felt beside me again. My lips curl into a drugged up sleepy smile as I go under.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 _Tris' POV_

My fight against Myra was over before it began. I was too worried about Gia and Four had said I could go to the infirmary after my fight. He didn't look like it was going to be good news.

I might have channeled too much of my worry and anger towards Eric into the punches I aimed at Myra. She barely put up any fight and that seemed to make me even angrier when I remembered why she was standing in front of me. She went down hard and I took her to the infirmary myself.

Gia was bad and I couldn't help the tears that coursed down my face as I looked at her. She had never looked so small to me before. Her personality was so large that it was hard to imagine she wasn't a size to match. I sat for a while holding her hand and was startled when I felt someone beside me.

I looked up to see Christina looking at Gia with a contemplative look on her face. "Did she really fight Eric?" Her voice was soft. Partly from her own being sore from her screams and cries during her ordeal. It was also soft from awe I think.

I could only nod and look back to Gia. The fight running through my mind over and over. Now that I had time to think about it I was awed myself. It showed me what she had been saying all along. That just because she was a girl, small and looked like she shouldn't be able to fight didn't mean shit.

She could and was just as fierce and capable as any of the Dauntless men. Apparently that extended to one of the most cruel and domineering leaders Dauntless had.

I smirk slightly as I look back to Christina. "He is apparently in his own room. He had to be carried out of the training room too."

The corners of her mouth turn up slightly she moves closer. "Why did she do it Tris? Why did she try and help me? I know she doesn't like me."

I shrug and smile. "Gia takes some getting used to. It takes her a while to warm up to people. She is also very protective and I think part of the issue she has with you Christina is because she thinks you have or will hurt me in some way. I don't know why but she seems very protective of me. She has been for two years." I smile as I remember all the little moments that Gia would show she cared in actions not so much words. That was just her way.

I sigh and look back to Christina. "I think she meant what she said about us all needing each other to get through this. Despite what she might feel about you as a friend I think she sees you as family, Dauntless family."

Christina nods and chews on her lip. "I shouldn't have given up. I just couldn't take the pain. It was so overwhelming in that moment. She told me I am stronger than I think. I hope she is right."

I give a small laugh. "Gia usually is. If she said it Christina then she really believes it."

Christina sighs one more time before she says she is going to leave for dinner. I know I should go and eat, that even Gia would be telling me that I needed to go. I had decided not to when I was shooed away by the nurse after she told me that a few leaders were coming by and I should go along.

My last look of Gia was when the senior leader Max and the nurse were standing beside her bed talking in worried whispers.

That night I dreamed that Christina was hanging from the railing again but by her toes this time. Someone shouted in a voice that sounded eerily similar to Eric's that only a divergent could help her. I ran forward to pull her up but someone shoves me over the edge before I can get to her. I wake up before I hit the rocks.

Sweat-soaked and shaky from the dream, I walk to the girl' bathroom to shower and change. When I come back, the word "Stiff" is spray-painted across my mattress in red. The word is written smaller along the bed frame and again on my pillow. I look around, my heart pounding with anger.

Peter stands behind me, whistling as he fluffs his pillow. It's hard to believe I could hate someone who looks so kind-his eyebrows turn upward naturally and he has a wide, white smile.

"Nice decorations." He says smugly.

"Did I do something to you that I'm unaware of?" I demand. I grab the corner of a sheet and yank it away from the mattress. "I don't know if you've noticed but we are in the same faction now."

"I don't know what you're referring to." He says lightly. Then he glances at me. "And you and I will never be in the same faction."

I shake my head as I remove my pillowcase from the pillow. I won't show him my anger but I will keep it saved and use it. He wants to get a rise out of me but he won't. Not in the way he expects anyways.

Everytime he fluffs his pillow I think about punching him in the gut.

Al walks in and I don't even have to ask him to help me; he just walks over and strips the bedding with me. I will have to scrub the bed frame later. Al carries the stack of sheets to the trash can and together we walk to the infirmary.

He didn't seem to want to go with me at first when I told him I was going to check on Gia. But then he refused to let me go alone.

"Ignore him." Al says on the way there. "He's an idiot and if you don't get angry he'll stop eventually."

"Yeah." I touch my cheeks. They are still warm with an angry blush. I try to distract myself to keep from thinking too much about how angry I am and how much I do want to use a few of those moves Gia showed me.

"Did you talk to Will?" I ask quietly. "After…..you know."

"Yeah. He's fine. He isn't angry." Al sighs. "Now I'll always be remembered as the first guy who knocked someone out cold."

"There are worse ways to be remembered here. At least they won't antagonize you."

"There are better ways too." He nudges me with his elbow, smiling. "First jumper."

Maybe I was the first jumper but I suspect that can only carry a person so far in Dauntless. That won't last long in memories if everything else about the person is forgettable or not good.

I clear my throat. "One of you had to get knocked out, you know. If it hadn't been him it would have been you."

"Still, I don't want to do it again." Al shakes his head, too many times, too fast. He sniffs. "I really don't."

We reach the door to the infirmary and I stop to face him. "But you have to."

He has a kind face. Maybe he is too kind for Dauntless. I want to remind him of Gia's words. I want to have her tell him. I do neither. One because he wouldn't appreciate the reminder of Gia since he took offence to how she handled the thing with Christina at the Chasm.

The second I can't do because when we make it to the infirmary Gia is nowhere to be found. She was discharged sometime in the night. That is all I can get out of the nurse that shooed me away. From the way she turned white and didn't even let me stay a moment more, I knew something had happened.

I practically ran to the training room after that. I wasn't late but I needed to see if Gia was there. All I could feel was a cold hand at the base of my spine telling me that she didn't leave on her own. It didn't help that I had overheard that Eric had walked out around the same time too.

Please let her be there!


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Sorry it took me a while to get this out. I wanted to get the fight with Peter right and the reactions as well. So a little about this...I have decided for the purposes of my story I am going with the choosing age is at the age of 20. This is due to the maturity level of some of the actions as well as my content. So Tris and the others are 20 at this time while Eric, Four and Zeke are around 22. Other than that I hope you enjoy the new chapter!**

 **Chapter 7**

 _Gia's POV_

I lay there longer then I should have. I know I need to get up, get away from Eric and the temptation to lose myself in him and his touch. I had forgotten how tenderly he could hold me while we slept. I had forgotten the feeling of safety and love I felt when he pressed kisses to my head and breathed me in even in his sleep.

I shouldn't allow myself to but I stay in this little bubble. A pain med, emotionally exhausted, physically battered, mentally clogged induced bubble. We are faced into each other with my head in the crook of his arm and close to his bare chest. I can't even take the time to look my fill at him because I am too busy with my nose against his skin breathing him in.

I will not cry. I will not soften my resolve in this one bit. I can't afford to. If it were just me that was at risk I would do so and die happy for one more moment with him again. It isn't just about me and him anymore. It had never been about us and it had just taken me far too long to realize this.

I realize I took too long and too many liberties when my lips pressed against him with a mind of their own it seemed. Eric's hands that were holding me close to him began to slowly move along my body. He isn't fully awake yet and I can't let him get that way or I will be lost.

I am already pulling away when the banging starts. The sound jolts me and I scowl as I felt myself jump slightly. Eric's throat along with his chest rumble as he is now fully awake but doesn't move to go to his door.

"Ignore it." He gets out as his hands move to lock me in place, pulling me closer and moving to what I know will be him making that move to pull me in for a kiss.

I risk looking at his face for the first time since waking and wish I hadn't. His eyes are sucking me in with their flickering blue grey depths I know so well. I am just sending up silent prayers he doesn't also turn on that fucking smile that could make my insides melt into nothing.

The gods must be listening to me….for fucking once...because the next events cause him to scowl and move towards the door.

"Open the fucking door now, Coulter. I know you know have her in there." Four's angry and thunderous voice booms over the sound of his fist hitting the door.

"Fucking number boy." Eric growls as he moves to get up. He throws a look over his shoulder at me. "Don't fucking move, Gia. Stay right there while I get rid of this shithead."

As if I am going to wait around for what Eric has in store. I would rather face him in the ring again. Speaking of….

I get up and move to his attached bathroom to take in myself. He used the good shit on us both for sure. I could tell by my probing that I still had to be careful of my ribs. My head still hurt slightly meaning that I might have concussions but otherwise I am looking fairly good. I am still bruised heavily but they will fade faster after the major injuries have been seen to by the nanites.

I sigh at the fact that he went to that trouble. How I must have looked and how bad I must have been for him to openly take me from the infirmary like that. To give me the serums I know he has to keep in stock for his own use so no one finds out just how capable our bodies are of healing and resistant to normal serums they are. I know the process personally to getting more of these from Erudite. Eric is going to catch hell for what he did to heal us both.

I am just pulling on my pants when there is a commotion and then Four is standing in the doorway to the bathroom. His eyes move over me, cataloging my condition.

His eyes narrow and I hear a slight sigh of relief. "Are you ok Gia?" His voice is soft and angry.

I nod slowly. "Better than I should be I think."

"Like I said, _Four_ , she is most certainly not dead or dying. Would be rather fucking stupid of me to bring her here just to fucking kill her or let her die." Eric gets this out with gritted teeth.

I bite my lip to keep from laughing at the tone he has. He is all but calling Four a dumbass and as much as I don't want to, I agree with that. Eric locks eyes with me, then rolls his dramatically and my lips twitch against my will.

I am feeling grateful as hell for Four's appearance. Not only because it shows me he does care if he was willing to barge in on Eric's dwelling to find me and make sure I was ok. But also because it was saving me from myself. There was no way I was going to be able to have stopped Eric or myself just then.

"Well, then I will make sure that Gia makes it to where she belongs now that she is in better condition. Gia, you won't have time to get showered before training unless I excuse you. Something tells me you aren't going to let that happen though." Four gets out as he crosses his arms over his chest letting Eric know he won't be leaving without me.

Eric sighs because he already knows the answer. "If you would be so kind Four, go fucking wait in my living room. Then you can escort us both to training room like a good little boy."

The are glaring at each other for a moment until Four looks to me and I can see questions and thoughts flashing through his mind in lightening speed. He masks it quickly, smirks and then nods. "I will be right in the living room. You will want to hurry though."

I nod confidently but am feeling anything but. I wasn't afraid Eric was going to hurt me physically. No, the pain I was afraid he was going to cause was all centered in my heart. Eric follows after Four just enough to slam his bedroom door shut. I take this opportunity to finish getting dressed as quick as possible. I just have my socks and boots to get on when Eric stalks his way back into the bathroom.

I have time to straighten up and my butt hit the counter before he is already reaching for me. "Eric...no we can…." The bastard doesn't let me finish and knows better than to let me get room to move around. I am hemmed in completely when he takes my mouth in a kiss.

All fight goes out of me, if I was even going to fight. This was why it was dangerous for me to be alone with Eric at all. Around others we can put up those walls, put up the fight. We conditioned ourselves for years to do this. Once we were alone though we had conditioned ourselves just as much to strip ourselves bare. It was our way of showing just how much we meant to each other. To lay ourselves bare with every ugly part we had there, knowing neither would judge or be cruel to the other.

Those same hands that were brutaly pounding into my flesh just hours ago are now nothing but tender as he strokes my face, hair and neck while our mouths and tongues slide over each other.

There is a loud clearing of a throat from the other room and we break apart panting. He won't let move far from him as he presses his forehead to mine. "Fuck Gia, I have missed you." His voice is full of the pain and anger at us being separated.

I squint my eyes closed hard trying to stop myself from answering but knowing I can't. "I have missed you too, Eric." My voice breaks on the words.

He pushes me back to look at me with his forehead furrowed. "Then why did you cut me off Gia? I don't understand...you just stopped seeing me. You moved all of your shit out one day and I never saw you again."

My own forehead furrows as I scowl. "You know why I had to do it Eric."

He growls at me and shakes his head. "No Gia. I don't fucking know why you abandoned me, abandoned us. I just kept being told you were refusing to see me. No explanation from you. No note. Nothing." He pushes me away and I can see the absolute hurt and anger coming from him as he pushes a hand through his hair. "Even if we had never been together for those three years, we had still been the best of friends for almost all our lives Gia. How could you just walk away from me like that?"

I can feel my rage at Jeanine boiling up to the surface. I shouldn't be surprised at her manipulations. Eric would have been the harder to control and he wouldn't have accepted it was needed. She needed him focused and angry here, believing he would never see me again. Believing I wanted nothing to do with him.

My voice goes deadly soft as my anger boils in my eyes. "Eric, I never abandoned you. I was _ordered_ to remove myself from our apartment and from your life. I was not so subtly told that if I failed in this it would be endangering your life. Did you think so fucking little of the things we said to each other to believe that anything short of your life being threatened could keep me away from you; either that or my own death?"

Eric's nostrils flare and he grips me to him. "She told you to stay away and if you didn't…"

"That you wouldn't be of any use to her or the cause and might as well be disposed of." I finished for him. There was much more to what she spat out in order to ensure she got her way but he wasn't ready to hear that. If he ever would be.

"Time to go Gia!" Four calls out from behind the door but I can tell he is closer to it this time.

Eric grumbles briefly then sighs and shakes his head tiredly. "I want to talk about this more Gia. You will need another round of the healing serum anyways."

I shake my head to deny it and the need but he shakes me so that I meet his eyes. He is begging me to let him do this. To fix what he caused even if I was just as much at fault as he was.

I sigh and nod. "Depending on how fights and the day goes….after dinner?"

He thinks briefly and then nods. "Meet me here. You better go ahead and go with Four."

I move to go to his room to get my boots on and he tugs on my hand to pull me to him for a brief kiss. When he pulls back he gets a smug look on his face with that smirk I want to kiss and punch off him.

"The next time you are in my bed Gia, it won't be just to sleep. Make no mistake baby, that is going to be soon." He whispers and winks before he smiles at me when I scowl at him.

I can hear his laugh and feel my insides melting as I yank on my boots and storm out of the room. Four's head is tilted and his eyebrow quirked as the sound of Eric's genuine laughter follows me.

He stands there looking at me for a moment before he smiles a little and motions for me to go ahead. Once we are out of the door he assumes the posture and face I am used to seeing on him.

"Gia, you really need to take care with how you are around him. I can't protect you more than I already am trying to. You are making it very difficult to do the little bit I can do." He gets out in a frustrated huff.

My eyes move over to him as we walk. "You are mistaken Sir, if you think that you can protect me at all. As a senior member and instructor you do have some power. But we both know that unless you carry the rank of Leader in training or Leader….well you have no say in anything that is or has been going on."

My tone isn't quite deadly but it is a hard and my eyes are as well. He stops me and shakes his head. "That just isn't a possibility."

Now my eyes go deadly to match my voice. "Then be content to stand by and watch things happen beyond your power to know or stop."

We stand there staring at each other like this for long seconds before he nods. "You think that will help? Me going for leadership and bringing on more of the rivalry?"

I tilt my head and shrug. "Ask yourself what good has trying to keep away from that rivalry done? Has it lessened with time? What has been lost during all that time hiding from things? Choices will need to be made. Lines are being drawn and there is no 'safe zone'." I say this last bit as the codeword that factionless use to refer to their base of operations.

His eyes widen and his chest heaves in panic I am sure. Then he wipes that all away. "I am not leaving Dauntless."

I tilt my head and nod. "Good. Because we need our instructor." I sigh as I remember something and then I am off running until Four calls me back to slow down.

"Gia! She's fine." He knew the words to speak to get my attention. I turned back and waited for him to catch up.

I smiled widely. "How did she do? I know it was just against Myra but it was a good fight to break her in on."

Four nods with his lips pursed a little. "She did really good." His tone was tight as if there was something about the fight that displeased or is displeasing to him.

"But she was little too good for your liking?" I supplied and my own tone was not happy, but with his attitude.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "She is just more...aggressive that I would have thought."

I stay quiet as we make our way across the pit trying to think of how to respond to that. "Just because she is willing to bring the fight to the person does not mean that she loses any good part of herself in the process. It is doing her no favors and quite frankly is demeaning her abilities just because of where she came from or that she is a girl."

That causes him to pause and he gives a nod. We don't speak further as we make our way through the compound to the training room. When we get closer I can't stop myself from practically running through the doors and scanning the room quickly.

I don't have to look hard or long as I am almost pummeled from the side by a speeding body that collides with mine. "Gia!" Tris says in a tone that I know she must be fighting back the tears of knowing I am ok.

My arms go around her and laugh with a smile. I cannot describe the relief I feel at knowing she isn't wanting nothing to do with me after everything that happened. I already knew she had come to mean so much more to me during these two years. I just didn't know how much until I thought her friendship might be lost to me.

With a sigh of relief we face each other with smiles. What surprises me is when Christina walks up when Will does as well. She gives me a timid smile and nods.

"Good to see you Gia." Will says with a smile even through his bruising. "I told these girls that you were too stubborn to go down for long."

That feeling, the one of being just a young woman, comes over me for a second. Then I see Eric walk in behind us and the reason we are all in this room rushes back to me.

With a nod and a laugh I look to the three of them. "You are damn right about that. But I think that goes for all of us." I give both Will and Christina smiles before turning us towards the class.

Yesterday is behind us but we have a long ways to go and more pain in store for us today.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 _Third Person POV_

Gia and Tris walk further into the room while talking about Tris' fight with Myra. Gia is beaming at Tris when she describes it and Will interjects his own perspective.

All that stops when they get to the chalkboard so they can see who they are facing for the day.

Everyone focuses on the name beside Tris'. Her opponent is Peter.

"Oh no." Christina murmurs. She had been holding a muffin wrapper in her hand and when she saw the name she crumpled it and scowled. "Are they serious? They're really going to make you fight him?"

Tris and Gia look at each and nod with a shrug. Inwardly, Tris is delighted. An anger she hadn't known she was capable of had been building towards Peter. But coupled with her frustration yesterday and then events this morning she knew she was looking forward to the fight.

"Maybe you can just take a few hits and pretend to go unconscious," suggests Al. "No one would blame you."

Tris stiffens instantly, with Gia right alongside her. They are both surprised, though, when it is Christina that speaks up.

"That would be giving up Al. Dauntless do not give up. It is a hard lesson to learn…." she reaches up and touches her face gingerly but then her back stiffens and she turns to glare at Al "...but we all have to learn it, even if it is the hard way."

Then she turns and smiles over at Tris and Gia. "Besides, I think we both know that size doesn't always make a person better."

Her tone is smug as she looks over to Eric who is sporting bruising just as heavy as Gia's. This causes all of the group to break out into cautious smiles.

Gia and Tris had moved to the side of the room, half listening to Al and Christina's chatter as she tries to talk to him about his attitude towards fighting right now. Gia felt it better for a former faction member to address that rather than going off on him like she wanted to. She had said all she would and could to try and help in about the nicest way she could that first night.

Anything she had to say now wouldn't be nice at all. Not that she had a problem with saying any of it, she just had other things to worry about. Namely Tris' fight with Peter. This was all Eric. He most likely had already made the match up the day before when his anger at Gia had been its highest but he still would have done it today.

"You can't hold back in this one Tris. Remember what I taught you and focus. Don't let him goad you into too much of that anger or get to your confidence. He has strength, sure but he is no more skilled than you are. He will be cocky and won't believe you are capable of really hurting him. Use that and take him down." Gia coaches Tris, bouncing slightly on her heels. Her arms are crossed and she isn't looking at Tris.

Neither are looking at the other. Right now they are talking but watching the ring and the fight that is going on.

Molly and Edward are fighting. He is much faster than she is and they both know that Molly will no win today.

As the fight goes on Tris runs through the moves in her mind that Gia has been teaching her. She runs through scenarios in her mind to try and visualize how it might go. Peter is cruel and uses words but he also is not afraid to be physical. He is a dirty fighter.

' _Sometimes you have to get dirty, Tris. Not all fights are going to be fair, life isn't always fair._ ' Gia's words as they were talking about Peter and his attack on her at school shortly after meeting floated to her. At the time she hadn't truly understood it but now, seeing what she had here so far, she was beginning to get it.

Four told everyone yesterday to exploit the opponent's weaknesses, and aside from his utter lack of likable qualities, Peter doesn't seem to have any. He's tall enough to be strong but not so big that he's slow. He has an eye for other people's soft spots. He's vicious and won't show mercy to anyone, but Tris knows that for sure he will not sure show her any. He does underestimate her, they all have so far.

She wants to show them they are wrong. Being from Abnegation does not make a person weak and it has only made her more determined. She will not be ranked last.

By the time Molly peels herself off the ground, looking only half-conscious thanks to Edward, Tris' heart is pounding that she can almost feel the blood and adrenaline coursing everywhere. Even her fingertips.

Gia holds Tris eyes for a moment. She doesn't show her apprehension but her belief that Tris can absolutely do this. It will hurt, she will hurt and get hurt, but she knows her friend is made of stronger stuff than anyone here will be expecting.

Tris nods and walks to the center of the arena. Her stomach churns and her face begins to flush with that anger, banked until now, from this morning. Peter comes towards her, muscles standing at attention and smiled at her.

"You ok there, Stiff?" He says. "You look like you're about to cry. I might go easy on you if you cry."

Over Peter's shoulder she sees Four standing by the door with his arms folded. His mouth is puckered, like he just swallowed something sour. Next to him is Eric, who taps his foot faster than her heartbeat.

One second Peter and Tris are standing there, staring at each other, and the next Peter's hands are up by his face, his elbows bent. His knees are bent too, like he's ready to spring.

Tris sees the small nod from Gia and takes her stance.

"Come on, Stiff." he says, eyes glinting. "Just one little tear. Maybe some begging."

' _As if I would ever beg you for anything you dick!'_ Tris screams in her head, her anger flaring up.

The anger makes her do exactly what she wasn't supposed to and shouldn't have done. She reacts and moves first, a move he is expecting apparently. She goes to kick him in the side but he catches is easily. He yanks her foot forward, knocking her off-balance. Her back smacks into the floor and she pulls her foot free, scrambling to her feet.

' _Calm down Tris. Do not let him cloud your thinking._ ' Gia thinks and wills her friend to understand.

Tris knows she has to stay on her feet so he can't kick her in the head. She needs to calm down and focus. If she goes down he will not hesitate to brutalize her badly. He is enough of a coward to do just that.

"Stop playing with her," snaps Eric. "I don't have all day."

Gia's eyes snap to Eric's and she bares her teeth but Eric is oblivious right now. If he only knew…..she is tempted, so damn tempted but she can't. She must protect Tris.

Peter's mischievous look disappears. His arm twitches and pain stabs her jaw then spreads across her face, making her vision go black at the edges and her ears ring. She blinks and lurches to the side as the room dips and sways. She was cursing herself, she thought mentally but it could be heard in her mutters to those outside of the ring.

She missed the signs Gia had told her to look for. The ones that she said would signal when someone was preparing to strike. His muscle twitching was the signal.

She is off balance and needs to move out of his reach, so moves as far as the arena will allow. He darts in front of her and kicks her hard in the stomach. His foot forces the air from her lungs and it hurts. It hurts so badly she can't breathe. Maybe that's because of the kick, she doesn't know she just knows she is falling.

On your feet Tris! The thought is mirrored by more than one person standing around the ring and the girl in the ring as well.

She pushes herself up but Peter is already there. He grabs her hair with one hand and punches her in the nose with the other. This pain is different, less like a stab and more like a crackle. Crackling in her brain and spotting her vision with different colors; blue, green, red.

"Enough!" Tris screams at herself and Peter.

' _He wants to play dirty, well then let's play"_. She doesn't try and shove him off her because he wouldn't let her go even if she could break his hold. He went for a weak spot, well he had a hell of one open and ready for her to go for.

She blocks the punch that was going for her ribs with one elbow, feeling it jar and shake as pain bloomed along it. The other hand though balled up and slammed heavily into his unprotected groin.

There was a satisfying gasp from Peter as he tried to ball up and protect it but Tris was already striking again, two more times in rapid succession. It was like watching a rolly polly trying to curl up in on itself to go into protection mode.

Males all around the arena were grabbing themselves and wincing but Gia could only feel satisfaction. Even more when she saw Tris use the fact that Peter was doubling over to bring her knee up to connect with his face. His head snapped back but he wasn't out.

Peter manages to straighten up, rage coursing through him. He is just inches away from Tris and her mind whirls with her next move. She can't let him strike again or she will go down hard.

A move that Gia worked with her on extensively pops to mind and her body follows along without another thought.

Four had been about to leave when he saw the blood flowing from Tris' face. He wasn't going to sit there and watch something he was helpless to stop. When Tris had screamed in pain and frustration laced with anger that it was enough, he had at first thought she was quitting. That she was trying to concede and he could tell from the way Eric was tensing, poised to move forward and met out another lesson, he thought the same thing.

It should be amusing the shocked as hell expressions they both shared when that was far from what Tris did. It became obvious that she had been telling herself enough when she launched back an attack. The dirtiest either had ever seen in an initiate and that's saying something since both of their fights had been dirty as well.

What had both looking at each other in confusion though was the next move that Tris pulled off. The one that led to the end of the fight. There shouldn't have been anyway that Tris knew it. Even if Gia had shown her, which was most likely the case, even Gia shouldn't have known it.

It was a move straight from the person both men had counted as a friend and mentor but that had been dead for close to two years.

Still standing just inches from Peter, Tris slightly drops her weight and knee on one side of her body while extending her right arm out, slightly bent. The posture is almost perfect and is meant to allow someone of a slight physical strength to be able to deliver a crippling blow called the one inch or even three inch punch.

Tris uses every bit of her core strength as she connects the punch straight into Peter's chest, knocking the wind from him and sending him back. Not waiting for him to get up she follows him to the ground and is raining her elbow blows down on his face.

Gia watches in satisfaction but also from the sign that Eric or Four will call the match. As soon as she hears Four's "Enough" she is moving to pull Tris off the now severely battered Peter, who is out.

Tris feels the hands moving her but she can't see well. She is surprised she is still conscious, though that seems to be fading as well.

Her knees give out but Gia holds her up, joined soon by Will.

"Get her to the infirmary. Get him up and there as well." Eric sneers down at the form of Peter in disappointment but also pleasure. He moves to circle Tris' name and doesn't see the glare Gia is sending his way over her shoulder.

Four hesitates, torn between wanting to take Tris himself but knowing he can't. He can't bring attention to what he feels. Eric would make her even more of an example as he seemed bent on making her.

His reflection is broken by Eric's low question to him. "Did you see what I saw there at the end Four?"

Four paused and looked to him for long moments before answering. Eric was white, as if he had just seen a ghost but also looked hopeful almost. Had Eric really been telling the truth the entire time about not having had anything to do with his death?

"I did. I am not sure how…"

Eric's lips thin and he nods. "It would have been Gia but…..how?" He mutters this to himself more than anything. Even with all of their combined training, even with what he suspected she had continued to receive, she shouldn't have been able to learn from his old instructor. It shouldn't be possible at all.

The one death that had occurred from a supposed suicide here at Dauntless years ago had been a fake. This he knew because he personally knew the person whose death was faked as he was taken by Jeanine. Eric also knew that Amar's was not a faked death created by Jeanine so that she could have another divergent to test or use. He had believed it to be real. So had Jeanine for that matter.

If Amar was still alive and his death had been faked, who had done it? How was Gia involved and what was he going to do about it?

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 _Tris_

When I wake up I don't feel much but the inside of my head is fuzzy. It feels like it is packed with cotton balls.

I feel confused for a moment about why I am in the infirmary and then I remember my fight with Peter. I think I won it but I am not sure. I remember him going down and me almost falling with him in my effort to make sure he stayed down.

"Is her eye already black?" someone close to me asks.

"Of course it is Al. She got hit in the face. Something you wouldn't know about." I try to place the voice. The words are something Gia would say but that is a male voice it is coming from.

There is a snort and chuckle that I somehow know belong to Gia. It is a wonder that she doesn't say anything else but I feel her hand on my face probing slightly.

I open one eye. The other stays shut like it's glued that way. Sitting to my right are Will and Al. Gia and Christina sit on the bed to my left. Christina has a ice pack on her jaw.

"What happened to your face?" I ask concerned. My lips feel clumsy and too large.

She laughs and shakes her head. "Look who's talking. Should we get an eye patch?"

I smirk, or try to but wince a little. "Well, I already know what happened to my face." I say in a dry tone. "I was there, sort of."

"Did you just make a joke, Tris?" Will says, grinning. "We should get you on painkillers more often if you're going to start cracking jokes. Oh, and to answer your question; I beat her up."

"I can't believe you couldn't beat Will." Al says shaking his head.

"What? He's good." She says shrugging good naturedly. "Plus, I think I've finally learned how to stop losing. I just need to stop people from punching me in the jaw. Something you might want to consider there Al before you start reproaching people about their fights."

She doesn't snap the last exactly but it is sharp. Gia looks at me and winks and I can only silently laugh a little. Gia is having an influence on more than just me it seems.

"You know, you'd think you would have figured that out already. The not getting hit part." Will says with a wink at her and trying to ease the tension though I can tell he took offence to Al's words. "Now I know why you aren't Erudite. Not too bright, are you?"

The two of them exchange rude gestures, playfully, while Al turns to look at me.

"You feeling ok Tris?" His eyes are dark brown, I notice. Almost the same color as Christina's skin. His cheek looks rough, like if he didn't shave it, he would have a thick beard. Not surprising considering he is considered a full grown man at the age of twenty.

"Yeah." I say with a nod and thin manage a small grin. "I just wish I could celebrate my win instead of being stuck here." I frown and look to Gia who is beaming at me. "I did win didn't I?"

The resounding "Yes!" I get from three of the people around me causes us all to laugh.

"Don't worry, we can celebrate in the proper Dauntless fashion once you get out of here." Gia smirks at me and I know she is probably talking about a tattoo. She has been hinting it might be time to see about another one.

"Don't worry about Peter being here either, he is still out and not expected to wake for a bit. It will be amusing to see how he acts come tomorrow. Not to mention he will most likely get beat again by Edward. Ed has been studying hand to hand combat since we were ten years old. For fun."

"Good," says Christina. She checks her watch. "I think we're missing dinner. Do you want us to stay here, Tris?"

I shake my head. "I'm fine."

Gia looks to me worriedly and I shake my head. "Same thing you would say to me. That I need my strength and to get the food where I can." I frown and look her over for the first time. "But how are you?"

Christina and Will get up, while Al waves them ahead and the two leave as Gia answers me.

"I am better. It will be a bit before I am all healed but I am no worse than anyone else. So don't worry about me." She looks to Al worriedly who looks like he is refusing to leave. I shrug to her and she sighs. "I will be back after I get some dinner. I have to do something….but I will come back no matter what." She says firmly as if trying to convince her of something.

I decide I will wait to ask her what happened and where she was until we are alone. I nod and give her a smile before she hugs me and goes off leaving just Al and I.

He has a distinct smell. Sweet and fresh like sage and lemongrass. When he tosses and turns at night, I get a whiff of it and I know he's having a nightmare.

"I just wanted to tell you that you missed Eric's announcement. We're going on a field trip tomorrow, to the fence, to learn about Dauntless jobs." He says with a frown. "We have to be at the train by eight fifteen."

"Good." I say with a nod, eager to be able to get out of the compound. "Thanks."

"And don't pay attention to Christina. Your face doesn't look that bad." He smiles a little and I try to return it but don't. "I mean, it looks good. It always looks good. I mean, you look brave. Dauntless."

His eyes skirt mine and he scratches the back of his head. The silence seems to grow between us because I don't know how to respond. It was a nice thing to say but he acts like it meant more than just the words. I hope I am wrong but somehow know I am not. I could not be attracted to Al. I could not be attracted to anyone that fragile. I finally manage to smile as much as my bruised cheek will allow, hoping that will diffuse the tension.

"I should let you rest." He finally says. He gets up to leave, but before he can go I grab his wrist. I don't know why but something makes me want to reach out to him. To try and get him to try here.

"Al, are you ok?" I ask. He stares blankly at me and I add. "I mean is it getting any easier?"

"Uh.." He shrugs "A little"

He pulls his hand free and shoves it in his pocket. The question must have embarrassed him, because I've never seen him so red before. If I spent my nights sobbing into my pillow, I would be a little embarrassed too. At least when I cry, I know how to hide it. Not that I have done much of that since coming here.

"I lost to Gia. After your fight with Peter." He looks at me. "I took a few hits and fell down then stayed there. I think she knew though but she didn't say anything. Even though I didn't have to stay down, I did. I figure….I figure that since I beat Will, if I lose all the rest I won't be ranked last. I won't have to hurt anyone anymore either."

My forehead furrows in my frown that can't be clearly shown by my mouth. "Is that really what you want?"

He looks down. "I just can't do it. Maybe that means I'm a coward."

I pause before I answer. "You're not a coward just because you don't want to hurt people." You are one for giving up so easily though. I finish in my mind but know that isn't the right thing to say right now.

For a moment we are both still, looking at each other. If he is a coward it isn't because he doesn't enjoy pain it is because he refuses to act.

He gives me a pained look. "You think our families will visit us? They say transfer families never come on Visiting Day."

"I don't know." I reply. "I don't know if it would be good or bad if they did."

"I think bad." He nods. "Yeah, it's already hard enough." He nods again, as if confirming what he just said, and walks away.

In less than a week, the Abnegation initiates will be able to visit their families for the first time since the Choosing Ceremony. They will go home and sit in their living rooms and interact with their parents for the first time as adults.

I used to look forward to that day, before I determined I couldn't force myself to stay. I used to think about what I would say to my mother and father when I was allowed to ask them question at the dinner table.

In less than a week, the Dauntless-born initiates will find their families on the Pit floor, or in the glass building above the compound and do whatever it is the Dauntless do when they reunite. Maybe they take turns throwing knives at each other's heads. I give a quiet laugh at that, because it really wouldn't surprise me.

And the transfer initiates with forgiving parents will be able to see them again too. I suspect mine will not be among them. Not after my father's cry of outrage at the ceremony. Not after both of their children left them.

I know my mother understands, understood and was even telling me it was ok. Maybe if I could have told my father that if I had stayed it would have only been for him, for them. Would he have still wanted me to stay even knowing I would be miserable and living a lie?

I could lie to myself and try to say that I was confused about what to choose because I am Divergent. If I had told him that, would they have been able to help me. Would it honestly have made my choice any different. Even if I could have trusted them with that secret, and it boils down to I didn't, I can't lie to myself.

Being Divergent didn't make my choice any different. I think even had the test told me I was Abnegation, with how I feel and have always felt, I would have still chosen Dauntless.

It doesn't help the hurt that I know that my family won't be among those on visiting day. I clench my teeth as the tears come. I am angry with myself for feeling guilt for making the only choice I could to be able to be happy. I am angry for feeling guilt for growing up and trying to take my place in our society as our society deems I should.

No matter how angry I am about the hurt and guilt I feel it doesn't stop the tears from coming.

Maybe I drift to sleep and maybe I don't. At some point I swear that I see Eric standing near the bed, watching me. My head is fuzzy though because the nurse had come to give me more medicine.

There are more whispered voices and I can hear Gia telling me to rest and she will be there with me. When I wake up, sometime later she is beside my bed. She looks even better than she had just a little bit ago. I sit up and notice that I am feeling much better than I had a little bit ago.

"Tris?" She tilts her head and smirks at me. "You want to get out of here don't you?"

I nod with a smile to her. "I don't want to be here in the morning when Peter gets out. I don't want him seeing me in here."

She nods approvingly and helps me to dress then helps me to slips out of there. We move quickly to get to the dorm and with a sigh that I didn't think was possible at slipping onto the lumpy bed, I drift back to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: This is a small chapter with a surprise POV that is setting up a few things and will also start a bit of chain reaction in the DU. I hope you enjoy and like the twist. More to come...sorry so slow. Health and life are making writing time scarce. I haven't forgotten or abandoned anything and am writing or plotting all the time.**

 **Chapter 8**

 _Max_

Two days into training and this shit is already giving me a massive migraine. Jeanine's demands are getting fucking ridiculous. I don't know who this Gia Pearle is exactly to her but she is going ballistic that the girl transferred. From what I have seen so far she belongs here.

Whether I liked to admit it at the time, so did Eric when he came over. I didn't want Eric to be in leadership. The thought of having a puppet of Jeanine's worming his way through my faction rankled me. Having to work with the woman at all rankles me. I hate every moment of it but it has also become glaringly obvious this is the only way to do what needs to be done.

My nostrils flare and my fists clench as I close my eyes. I breath in and out slowly to calm my anger at what led to this road. I can't let it be about myself. I can't let it be about my grief, about my pain, about my need for revenge. It has to be about the city, about my faction...but it is so fucking hard. I thought as the years passed that it might get easier to put away all of my own personal reasons and only concentrate on what being a leader of Dauntless is all about. I was wrong, it hasn't gotten easier.

The email I just got done reading from Jeanine has brought all of that pain to the surface. I think she fucking delights in bringing it up, the reason for my agreeing in the first place. I can't help but wonder if she doesn't do this shit on purpose. When she thinks I am starting to question things too much, when things aren't going exactly her way, she doesn't hesitate to remind me of their deaths at the hands of those monsters.

So now she is demanding we find a way to get the girl, Gia, back to Erudite, bring her in on the plans with Dauntless or is implying other things. The fucking nerve of the bitch! She also is demanding I let Eric nowhere near her. How she hopes to bring her in on the plans without letting the one in charge of training near her, I have no clue but it wasn't like he was going to be there day to day.

That is until he surprised the shit out of me and volunteered to do just that. He surprised me again by cleaning himself up and making himself look less like a punchline in a joke about what Dauntless are portrayed. He has flashes of being his own man that are happening more and more. More and more I am realizing that he really is and was the right choice for leadership. I just wish…..

I sigh and growl when I hear a beep from my communicator.

"What?" I bark out in way of greeting.

"Sir, it is Tonya from the infirmary. I don't know if you were informed…" She stops and I can hear her stuttering over whatever she is afraid to tell me.

"Informed of what, Tonya?" I ask in a more calm manner.

"Eric and an Initiate were brought in earlier sir. They fought and are both in bad condition. The girl more than Eric at the moment. I…..I ran some tests and….I really think you need to come down here sir." Tonya finishes in a hushed tone.

"I'll be right down." I tersely get out and then shove out of my chair.

One fucking guess just who that initiate is that he fought against. If he was doing what I think he was doing, following anything Jeanine ordered him to do, without talking to me first….I would have his balls in my hand before the day was out.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Eric was bad. They had fucked each other up but good. He was being dosed with healing serums and meds to keep him out but they weren't having the same effect as they should have. That was concerning in itself but to find out that the girl, Gia was the same, was even more concerning.

Tonya was just finishing telling me about Eric, while I stood beside his bed in a private room.

"I want to see the girl and go over what the tests you ran. You still haven't told me what has you so freaked out here Tonya, other than their deal with the serums." I say and turn from Eric's bed.

She takes a breath and nods. "I just need to get the visitor she has on her way. I half think she plans on sleeping here if she could."

Tonya gives a wry smile and bustles away but I follow closely. Gia's visitor is another initiate and another person of interest for Jeanine. Beatrice Prior...or as she goes by now, Tris. She does look distraught as Tonya shoos her away.

"Jesus, she looks bad." I mutter and grimace as I take in the young woman on the bed. Fuck this was bad. "How bad is she?" I turn back to Tonya who blanches and looks down.

"She has internal bleeding the the serum is slowing it down and slowly repairing, I just don't know if it will be fast enough. Concussions, fractured ribs, severe bruising. I am having to continuously inject them both with pain meds and tranquilizers just to keep them out enough. Their bodies are burning through them at alarming rates. Then there is something else I found…" She trails off and looks to me in concern then back to the girl on the bed.

I have been trying, this whole time that I have been standing here, to keep myself from reaching for the hand of the girl on the bed. I don't know why I have this urge but it is pressing on me. Just like for a moment on the roof when I looked into her eyes I swore I thought they were familiar to me. Eyes I hadn't seen since I lost everything…

"So like I was saying I knew she needed blood. When I ran her blood type I realized she has a very rare one and there is only one match to her in our system." Tonya's voice penetrated my thoughts and feelings, causing me to blink in confusion.

"What does that have to do with the serums? If she needs the blood get it to her." I demanded of her.

Tonya licks her lips nervously. "Well sir, like I said it is rare and we don't have anyone that donates it. We only have one person in the faction that is even of the same blood type."

"So get them here and get it from them!" I don't understand what the fucking problem is here.

She gulps and nods. "The problem is that person is you sir. The initiate has your blood type, Sir, and….." She takes a deep breath as if fearful of telling me the next part.

Hairs are standing up on my arms at her look and the little bit I know of anything related to science start coming together.

"I ran tests sir...because it is so rare. An anomaly really that this blood type would…."

I grit my teeth in frustration. "Get to the point already."

"I ran the tests sir, I ran them three times." She whispers and shakily hands me a paper.

I rip it from her hands and open it to take a look. Most of it I don't understand jack shit about. I do pick up on the most important part. DNA match and the percentage.

I have to reach out and steady myself for a moment. "This isn't possible Tonya. There must be some mistake. Run it again."

She shakes her head. "It isn't a mistake sir, I ran it several times. I don't know how….but….she is your daughter."

Her words weren't even processing. How was this fucking possible? Sascha was gone before this girl was even born. As far as I knew she hadn't been pregnant when her and my son were killed. My lips thin and I shake my head.

"What do we need to do to get her the blood she needs?" I can at least do that. After that….I don't know I would need to think about this.

"I have it all set up over here." She points to an area out of the way and I nod following her over there.

Things running through my mind at a million miles per minute. Both Gia and Eric had issue with the healing serums. Gia had my DNA and it was stated that she is my daughter. I will admit that from the moment I saw her on the roof I felt a….pull...of some sort to her. Her eyes were exactly like my Sascha's had been. How could she be my daughter though?

What is her connection with Eric that they share the same issue? Do I have a fucking son I don't know about….Eric? Jeanine is up to this in to her damn eyeballs. She had or has something to do with this. Is that part of why she wants Gia back? Does she know about Gia's connection with me.

My breath catches when I remember something. There can be several sources of samples to get DNA from. Mine is on file but Sascha's would be gone, if it was ever on file. I do have some of her things still though…

"I want you to run the test again but this time I will be providing samples. I will be bringing in something for you to pull a sample from, it would be hair." I pause and take the cotton ball off my arm that I had been holding on after she got the blood that was needed. "I also want this to stay classified. You talk to me only about this unless I tell you otherwise. I also need you to run DNA scans on Eric match him against anyone in the system. All initiates will have this done if they get sent in here from here on out. Am I understood?"

She bobs her head up and down. "Good. Keep me updated on both of their conditions."

"I should be able to back off the meds that are keeping Eric under soon but Gia will need more time before we need to decide if we have to send her to Erudite."

I shake my head. Fuck that. Until I get answers she doesn't leave Dauntless. "No. Do everything you need to. Double up on healing serums or call for stronger. I don't give a shit but she doesn't leave this infirmary. If she does you and anyone involved will have hell to pay. Am I understood?"

My tone is deadly and cold at the last. She pales even more then her pasty complexion is normally, swallows and nods.

"Good. I want to be notified as soon as Eric is awake."

With that I stop by and look one more time at the young woman laying on the bed, trying to see myself in her features, more importantly trying to see my wife there.

Right now her face is such a mess and battered that it is hard to tell anything. I grit my teeth at the thought that I might lose a daughter that I never knew existed. Eric better fucking hope that isn't the case….I will kill him myself.

I leave her care to Tonya and make my way back to the office. I stare for what seems like an hour at the computer at the email communications from Jeanine to me regarding Gia.

She is desperate to get her back. She is also trying to make sure I as well as others in leadership are aware that Gia can't be trusted. That she is a known manipulator and prone to fits of fantasy. I hadn't given much thought to those insinuations before but now I am taking them as Jeanine's attempt to poison the well, so to speak.

She is scared with Gia here and I intend to find out why. I have a feeling this is about to blow things all to hell.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Hey all! Since the email notifications were out on the chapter updates be sure to read Chapter 8 that was posted during that time. Otherwise I hope everyone enjoys the twists I am setting up and laying down!**

 **Chapter 9**

 _Eric_

I don't even have time to wonder about what I just saw before a guard comes to tell me I am being requested. My lips thin as I contemplate telling the guard to take a message that says 'piss off' back. Gia's fight is next and while I am not too worried because it is against the sniveling farm boy, she is still hurt.

"Are you going to run along like a good little boy?" Four asks snarkily. His tone and demeanor, one that is extremely uncharacteristic of him, lets me know how much what we just saw is unsettling him too.

"Fuck." I mutter and scratch the back of my neck. "Whatever. We will be talking about what just happened at some point..Four." I inform him but don't wait for his response before I am stalking out of the training room.

Gia is pissed at me but I already knew she would be when she saw who I had matched her friend to. It was a dick move to do it right out of the gate but I was pissed and jealous of how fucking close the two are. I also knew that if I pushed Gia hard enough she would come at me. Then I had a better chance of getting her alone. I knew she was going to lay into me when she came to the apartment tonight. I kind of looked forward to it. Our make up sex had always been fucking explosive.

I don't need to be told what I am needed for as I head to my office. I will be requested for a meeting in Erudite. I was expecting it honestly. I knew last night when I took Gia from the infirmary that it was going to get back to Jeanine. I was prepared for the shit storm I was going to get for the fight but also using the serums meant for me and an emergency….on her.

My computer is already letting me know I have an incoming call as I unlock the door and head in. I click the accept key and Jeanine's cold eyes come into view.

"I expect you here no later than an hour from now." She informs me coldly and then the call is disconnected.

My lips thin in anger and frustration. Some of the things Gia told me have been on my mind all day. Jeanine keeping me away from her by telling me repeatedly that Gia was the one that refused to see me. That Gia had moved on and was seeing other men, men in other factions even. She had even went so far as to show me fucking pictures….

My hands grip the back of the chair and squeeze tightly in anger.

There are still so many things I need answers to. If Gia was only being told to keep away from me….what was up with those things Jeanine showed me and was telling me? Could I trust Jeanine? Could I trust Gia? I am so fucking confused right now.

It is pretty clear that Gia is _not_ on board with what Jeanine has planned which is a problem for me or will be one soon. What could I do to bring her back though? What made her turn from the path that had been laid out for us from birth almost?

This was who we are….what we are...what we are meant to be...together. We are a fucking team and I need her.

So many questions but I plan to at least get some of the answers tonight...from both of the ladies in question.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I am seething as I ride the train back to Dauntless. Seething in pain and anguish, disgusted with myself.

How could this have happened? What had I done to us?

I had felt physically ill after Jeanine had dropped the fucking bomb on me. Why she had kept us apart. Why she had made Gia move out and then prevented us from having contact with each other. Once she found out what we had done, the line we had crossed, she had had no other choice.

I lean against the wall of the train car and feel my body vibrating with frustration and self hate.

"FUCK! Sick fucking bastard!" I yell into the howling and whipping wind.

My stomach can't take it anymore and I lean out the door and lose the contents of my stomach.

She's my fucking sister. Gia is my half sister. I still can't believe it. I don't know if it is just not wanting to believe it, to believe we have done something…..

There is something there that is screaming at me for being an idiot. That this could all just be another manipulation by Jeanine. The other part keeps running the conversation through my mind and how genuinely upset Jeanine had looked. How horrified she had seemed that she couldn't prevent it from happening and saying it was her failure. She had paired us together to give us the family we craved, never imaging that we would develop romantic feelings for each other.

The thought of what we had done together….

I felt such disgust and revulsion at myself. Then it is made worse because...I still want those things with her. In my mind I know she is forbidden and we can't but my heart and body is already protesting.

The train ride is torture and when I finally get to jump off I make my way quickly back into Dauntless. I am in an unused corridor when I stop and realize what exactly I was aiming for. I was about to go straight to Gia, drag her away somewhere and get to the bottom of this. The thought of seeing her chills my blood. I can't be near her. I can't be near her because even with what I know my body doesn't give a shit!

I am just some kind of sick fuck apparently.

It isn't dinner time yet. There is still an hour or so until then. I need to stay far away from anywhere Gia might be so I decide to go and hide out in my office. I have paperwork that needs to get done and a bottle of whiskey that will help to ease this disgust and pain in me.

I waste no time in downing a glass before I am even fully in my chair. I slammed into my office and went straight for the file cabinet where I kept the bottle at. I should just drink straight for the damn bottle but I need to maintain some kind of control.

I could get so drunk I end up doing the very fucking thing I am trying to avoid at all costs. I am more than half a bottle in and glaring at requisition reports when my office door slams shut, causing me to jerk and the whiskey in my glass to slosh in surprise.

Damn, I never even heard the damn thing open.

I look up and notice that it is Max, standing there glaring at me.

"You want to explain to me what the fuck you were thinking yesterday with that fight? Not only that, but what you were thinking taking Gia from the infirmary?" He stalks to me, demanding.

My mind is muddled for a moment as the guilt of it all comes crashing down on me. " 'S all fucked up now isn't it? Everything….all fucked up."

I shrug and down the drink that is remaining in the glass, going to pour me another one.

"Are you fucking kidding me? You're getting drunk?" Max sounds pissed, no not pissed almost murderous. But he is also looking at me worriedly.

I must look like something else if he is looking at me like that. I turn to the side and catch my reflection in some metal of the file cabinet, distorted but still enough for me to make out.

My new hair style is all kinds of messed up from the train ride and my own hands tearing through my hair. My vest and shirt are a rumpled mess. I am sure my eyes are bloodshot from the crying and raging I did when I knew no one could see me.

"What the fuck happened to you boy?" He grabs the bottle from me before I can fill the entire glass and let it run over.

I hadn't even realized I was still pouring while I was looking myself over. I am completely pissed already. He gently pries the almost overfull glass from my hands.

"I don't….." I stop and clear my throat that is tightening with rage, guilt and grief. "I don't know where to start…"

Max is silent for the longest time and nods, takes a long drink of the glass he never set down and motions for me. "Start from the beginning. How did you and Gia know each other before you and she transferred? Tell the fucking truth here Eric. There is shit going on...big shit and it involves me, you and a few others."

Oh shit, does he know? What the fuck can I tell him. That I am a fucking pervert that is in love with his own fucking sister?

I bury my head in my hands and feel my stomach churn. "We were paired together. Jeanine told you I was trained for what is coming. So was she. We are…..we were...best friends..." I say quietly and trail off not wanting to say that we are lovers.

"But you were more too. I can tell that right away." His tone is sharp and I hear disapproval dripping from him.

I can't bring myself to look at him and just nod. "It should never have happened. If I had known….if we had known. She said she didn't want us to feel guilty because it was her fault she didn't stop it. I should have known though dammit!" I yell and grab the nearest object on my desk to throw against the wall as hard as I can. Plastic shatters of the stapler I just destroyed.

"I am not understanding here. Jeanine didn't want you two together? What exactly are you talking about?" Max said with a sigh and took a drink, looking as if bracing himself.

Good. He is going to fuck need it for this shit.

"She's my sister. Gia is my fucking half-sister and I am a sick fuck that defiled her." I say with pure disgust dripping from my voice.

Max is silent but the disgust I am feeling never crosses his face or eyes. Rage does though. For a moment hate and rage cross over them before he wipes them from his expression and takes a breath.

His voice comes out toneless. "Let me get this straight. You two were paired together and developed a romantic relationship. One which, guessing how you are acting, carried on until...at least your transfer?"

"The year before. Gia was told to move out of our apartment the year before I transferred. The day I was told I would be transferring to be exact." I whisper in pain.

Max's lips thin and I swear I hear him mutter, "fucking convenient timing." Then he nods to me. "So you transfer and I am guessing no contact between the two of you until Gia transfers. That was a surprise to Jeanine but I guess to you too. What did Gia have to say about why she never contacted you? Was she told the same thing?"

I swallow and shake my head. "No. Jeanine says she didn't have the heart to tell either of us. Since we would never be put in the situation where we would be together again then she didn't see the need to. Gia said she was ordered to leave….that….that she was told if she didn't then my life was at risk."

Max let out a feral sounding growl and I heard glass crunching in his hand before the damn thing shattered. "She threatened you to get my dau….." He stopped for a second and looked at his hand then shook the liquid and glass off, while she shook his head.

"She's not your sister, Eric. I don't know what fucking game the bitch is playing at by telling you this. Maybe just to keep you away. Maybe to fuck with your head. Maybe both. But I can assure you Gia Pearle is no where near related to you." He says confidently and holds my eyes with that rage and anger in them.

"How do you know?" I ask, my forehead furrowed in confusion but hope is blooming in me.

'See….told you you dumb ass.' My internal voice chides me. It had been riding me the entire time Jeanine was speaking, demanding the fucking proof. To tell her I wouldn't believe what she was saying until she could prove it.

Max reaches into his pocket. Looks at a much crumpled paper, and another one that looks a bit more crisp. He sets the crisp one aside and then holds up the crumpled one. A look of love and affection crosses his face as he looks at the paper in his hand.

"Here. Read over this and tell me what you see in that."

My hands shake as I reach out to take the paper. For a minute, my sweaty hands prevent me from taking something he looked at like that. So I wipe my hands on my pants and then take a deep breath before reaching out again.

My eyes scan the document once, widen, my heart going into my throat and then scan it over three more times.

"She's your…..Gia is your daughter?" I ask looking up incredulously.

He nods slowly. "It looks like it. Not only that…...but she is mine and my wife's daughter."

My forehead furrows. Max wasn't a fount of openness. He had surprised me once shortly after I became a leader and it was clear we were aligning with Erudite when he told me flat out why he was doing it and Jeanine could suck his dick with her promises of power. Of course….we had been drinking heavily that night and it turned out it was the anniversary of the murders of his wife and son.

That was when I found out why he was on board with this. To stop something like that from happening to anyone else ever again. So that brings the question of….how the fuck is this possible?

"How is this possible?" I voice that same question but outloud.

His lips thin and he sighs. "That is just one of the questions we need to get the fucking answers to, Eric. For now, though, you can stop thinking you are some kind of monster for falling for the girl. Whether that continues…." He stops and holds my eyes for a moment.

Now that he knows she is his daughter is he going to try and stop me? Be another person keeping us away from each other because I am not good enough for her? That shit ain't happening.

"Tell me what happened with that fight Eric." He demands of me and the rage, a rage of a father, is there for me to see.

I sigh and close my eyes. "We always knew how to push each other's buttons, but the hurt I had for thinking she just abandoned me….abandoned us….it got to me. She was just as angry and neither of us wanted to give. Neither wanted to concede. As soon as I woke up though and saw what I had done to her…"

He is silent for long moments before he tilts his head and looks at me. "And you taking her from a medical center where she was getting treatment was because? Better yet...how was she checked out in a condition that she was believed to not going to make it, to the next morning walking around like it never happened?"

At first, I am not going to answer. I start coming up with some kind of lie to deflect things so I don't reveal too much. But this is the man's daughter. A daughter I almost killed by my own pride and stubbornness. It exposes me but it might help her.

"Normal serums do not work on us like for others. They never have. I don't know why and neither does Gia but we were always given our own special supply. It is limited because it is closely monitored. She would have had that while in Erudite but when she transferred…."

Max nodded in understanding, his lips thinned. "That got cut off. So you used your own stock to heal her?"

I nod and frown. "She needs another one. I was going to meet her tonight to give her another one to finish up the job."

"When are you supposed to meet her?" He looks at his watch and frowns.

"After dinner."

He sighs and nods. "I don't think it need be said that I will be watching things carefully. I know what Jeanine's orders are in that avenue regarding Gia. If anything is done it goes through me first."

"Understood." In that moment I have hope things won't go down the way they were headed with her. Maybe with a father and me….she could be swayed back. Either way…..I don't think I can do what I know she is going to order me to do.

"There is something else. Because of the revelations after the stint in the infirmary you both had, I requested a few things of the infirmary. I am sure you can understand but when both of you had the same issue with the healing serum, I had you tested as well."

Oh god...did I feel like I escaped only to be brought back down. I can understand he needed to see if we shared the same DNA and that is why we both had this same strange condition.

"Relax. I already told you she isn't your sister. What I did find out however shocked the shit out of me." He handed me the crisp paper he sat aside earlier.

I take it after handing the one showing Gia as his daughter. He folded that carefully and reverently before putting it in an inside pocket of his vest.

The new one I open and repeat the same process. This time I am in shock as I shoot out of my chair, it scrapes back and I let out a cry...of shock. "Bullshit! How...how the fuck am I related to _her_?"

He shakes his head and shrugs. "Another of those things we _need_ to and _will_ get answers to. I had and will be having any initiate that is brought in to be scanned. Especially those that have been marked as a person of interest. It just so happened that she was one of the first to be brought in and when her test was compared to yours...the match was found."

Fuck! How is it possible? The stiff is my sister?

Realization comes over me. Gia's insistence on sticking to her side. Her protectiveness. Her anger at me and the look she gave me when I ordered the stiff picked up and taken to the infirmary. That look was telling me I would regret my actions. I had thought it was because she was displeased by them, because of her friendship. Now I know it wasn't all because of that.

She knew.

"She knew." I whispered out loud.

"Come again?" Max asks as he stood too.

"Gia...I don't know how she found out or knew...but she knew. She came here already knowing the stif…" I pause and correct myself "...Tris. She has been teaching her things. I think to try and prepare her to survive here." I said connecting everything together.

"She could have met her at school and decided to do that on her own." Max supplied what should be the logical conclusion.

I shake my head and look to him. "I know Gia. I know her too fucking well. Yes, that is part of it, her friendship with her, But Gia doesn't and never has just went out and developed relationships with people. We were prevented and conditioned to _not_ do that very thing. Why do you think I have such a hard fucking time making friends here or even wanting to? Because I was raised and conditioned to do that. So was Gia. We were, however, taught to complete our objectives. If she took on the stiff…..I mean….Tris…" Fuck was I going to be able to accept this? "As an objective it could have started from there. I know Gia." I know my baby and if she found out this girl was my sister she would have moved hell and high water to protect her.

"She would have wanted to protect her, because she is your sister." Max concluded on his own and I nodded.

"That means Max….that she probably knows about you too. I wondered why she was so pissed off when it came to elders and the Chasm…." I muttered remembering that first day and her furious passion about that tradition.

Max's forehead furrowed and a flash of pleasure and apprehension went through his eyes. "What do you mean?"

I shake my head and sigh. "It was a conversation I walked in on at the table. She was giving the Candor girl a factional history lesson and it moved to what happens with Dauntless when they reach a certain age. She seemed so pissed off but it was personal for her. The bitterness and rage I heard in her tone. I couldn't place it then because I thought it was all directed to me. It was the first time we were face to face in three years."

Max paused and collected himself for a moment. "We can't be sure she knows about me, yet. I don't know that I want her to know yet. Not until I get answers to how this happened. Why it was kept from me...why she was kept from me."

I nod, and while I know that Gia has answers to that. I hold back from saying that to Max. I hold back because I don't know what his intentions are to her fully. The less he thinks she knows the more I can protect her. Please god let me fucking be able to protect her in all this shit. Even if I have to sell my soul to the devil I would do it for her.


End file.
